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Piercings or Body Mods as Punishment?

August 3, 2012 – 1:35 am

Piercings or Body Mods as Punishment?

Most of my sub’s tattoos and her ear/tongue piercing were already in place when I met her.

I gave permission for the nipple piercings and foot tattoo she’s had since, but they were her idea.

I recently pierced her outer labia myself as she mentioned above (on ring either side) and intend at least another pair when they are fully healed, a clit hood ring and probably a tattoo of my own design, but I think that will be enough then.

Photo by The Pain Files

I decide what mods she has, with prior consent that that’s how our dynamic works, so it’s not a ‘joint decision’, but neither is it non-consensual – some of the comments above seem to have a rather black and white view on that front IMHO.

I don’t think I’d use permanent body mods as a punishment really though, as they’re not really ‘immediate’ enough to make the impact IMHO.

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BDSM

Finding A Sub or Dom ?

June 30, 2012 – 12:31 am

Finding A Sub or Dom ? It can be frustrating to search, it seems impossible to weed out the vanillas and find the good matches about fellow fetishists. How do you even deal with the frustration?

To inject a bit of optimism, y’know I don’t think this is actually true.

OK, I admit I’ve never really looked for a vanilla partner, so I have no direct comparison, but it seems to me that everyone is ‘fishing in a small pool’. Everyone has requirements in a partner that will restrict their potential ‘pool’, and seeking a submissive IMHO is no more difficult than finding someone with a corresponding taste in music, interest in the same leisure activities, fan of the same team, or whatever else minority interest might be important to you.

Certainly for me, musical compatibility is rarer than sexual/kink compatibility (and nearly as important)

In many ways kinksters have it easier than a lot of other people as there is a very healthy network, both on-line and off, for the shared interest, with many people seeking from both sides of the dynamic (though I do second the advice to go to munches etc real-life and use on-line as a way to contact scene folk in general rather than relying on it to find a potential partner.

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BDSM Bondage Humiliation Pain & Torture

Real Dom or True Sub ?

June 6, 2012 – 7:30 am

I read the interesting definitions below and got a bit worried.

You see I agreed that most of it was how I view things, and I’d hate to think I was a ‘TRUE Dom’.

I’ve met and read about far too many of those in my 27 years of SM activity, and definitely wouldn’t want to be lumped with them. Thankfully, every single post I have ever seen about ‘TRUE Doms’ and ‘true subs’ has been nothing like my experience, and I am regularly told by people on this internet thing that I am not ‘TRUE’, so all is well…

Pictures from Shadow Slaves – Slave Girl Beauvoir

Then this comes along, and I thought OMG, maybe I’ve become one of ‘THEM’! because it described me fairly well, being as it is primarily a list of stuff real people aren’t… but it turns out to be OK after all, thanks to the comments:

Are you a jobless loser

Well, never really considered myself a loser, but I’ve been unemployed for long periods of my adult life in the past (even while having subs! – not true ones of course)

has no car

Nope I don’t own my own car ATM, and didn’t even learn to drive until I was 38

or worse… Married???

Yay! I am safe for life if I can’t be ‘TRUE’ and married. I’ve even been married twice, does that make me doubly false?

Are you a pussy who is afraid of pain but is more than willing to inflict it???

Yeps, fucking hate pain. Glad masochists don’t experience it the way I do!

So all in all I get to not be a ‘TRUE Dom’ (with the requisite unnecessary capitalisation) again. Business as usual

kami – real dom or true sub at ShadowSlaves.com

_____
A REAL Dom or not ?

GENUINE Doms, I know, can evaluate their business, search their souls, realize their weaknesses and then accept and make use of the answers is to be had derived out of this.

LOVE will NEVER cause you to powerless or less Dominating.

A TRUE Dom isn’t going to perfect!!!

A TRUE Dom is simply not just attitude, false pretense, lies, laziness and/or stubbornness.

An AUTHENTIC Dominant is allowed to confess fragility.

A TRUE Dominant is just about strength to tend to and safeguard all those people he treasures.

A REAL Dominant can not be constantly trying to satisfy his pride however has his / her submissives needs in your head to start with, even at the expense of each and every Dominant.

The TRUE Dominant can be quite nurturing and sharing.

The REAL Erotic sadist Can certainly have antagonistic Practical knowledge at all that have impacted their being that they’re determined to understand the best from to be able grow.

A CORRECT master Tend to be prepared to be told and feel what is the toys and implements they could be using recommended to their subs feel as if!!!

A TRUE Dom is permitted to cry (The audience is even allowed to sob if need be).

In case you truly Dom and you are therefore that are fortunate enough to come with a true slave… then TRUST and BELIEVE that up to you is the fact that slave is intact.

TRUE slaves are STRONG and SMART and AMAZING individuals that makes us have picked out who is going to support the TRUE Dom when the Dom can let his guard down and also believe in his slave in the interest of being there so you can use him when he needs.

As a form of TRUE Dom you’ve admit weakness and that you can’t live this lifestyle for yourself… because without a true slave/ what on earth is true Dom??? Nothing

A Dom needs a slavegirl with regard to Dom though I encounter a wide variety of Doms leaping from slavegirl to sub to feed their egotism… those Doms are deflecting their hunt to always be a lot more self aware.

All of us dominant are merely human beings so get rid of the specific pretense in the instant it serves virtually no one.

Photos from an Isabel Dean submissive movie at Shadow Slaves

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BDSM Bondage Humiliation Lezdom Pain & Torture

How To Tell If I am a Masochist ?

May 21, 2012 – 12:21 am

Sex is perhaps the only basic instinct of the human beings that has managed to intrigue man through all the ages, since time immemorial through its multi-faceted nature that can surely be considered to be beyond the boundaries of understanding of most human beings. There are countless dispositions as far as sex is concerned and each individual tends to have his own tastes and preferences and many of the times, these are quite queer in nature. Though, sex is symbolized to be the most expressive and spontaneous of all the ways of exhibiting love, more often than not, individuals seem to have their own different expectations and methodologies to derive the optimum satisfaction out of the act of having sex and these are usually quite varying in nature, depending much on the individual’s personal nature, tastes and preferences.

In this respect, it may be mentioned that the term “masochist” may be aptly used to describe the nature of an individual, who tends to derive pleasure or gratification in sexual aspects, out of humiliation or ill- treatment, either physically or mentally though one’s own self or through another individual. More often than not, this condition is quite harmful than being useful, as, it can have a detrimental effect on the individual’s physique as well as the mind, to some extent, if the condition goes on uncontrolled.

There are quite a few classes of masochists depending upon their individual dispositions. On one hand, it may include people who derive sexual satisfaction from being insulted or through any other kind of pain mated out onto them, while on the other, it may also include certain sections of people who enjoy definite types of physical pain for the rush of the hormone endorphin within their bodies. This pain may often be quite intense and enough to inflict a sense of fear in any normal human being.

One of the multiple faces of masochism is definitely, sadomasochism. This usually involves the deriving of intense pleasure through the inflicting of pain on the body of the individual either through himself or through a different individual. It may also often take the form of mental torture. It may seem quite strange, but, masochists usually tend to derive bliss from a condition of intense inflicting of mental pain also. This trait of masochists definitely set them apart from any other normal human.

In the present days, the number of cases involving masochism is greatly on the rise, partly because of the hectic and unorganized lifestyle that most people lead nowadays and partly because of the myriad hues of human nature that is quite difficult to understand for a normal human.

It should however be remembered, being a masochist does not necessarily imply the exhibition of any abnormality on the part of the person. In fact, being a masochist is not at all a grave problem, as long as this trait does not interfere with the normal well- being of the person. It starts to cast its ill – effects only when this trait goes beyond the control of the individual and poses a great threat, in the form of a disease that slowly, but steadily mars an individual’s self- respect and hence begins to throw the individual’s life into jeopardy. In such scenario, it is always advisable on the part of the masochist to consult a psychologist who can aptly help him to get himself out of this grave situation through proper counseling.

It can thus be rightly remarked that it is not at all abnormal to be a masochist as long as the individual can indulge in proper self –evaluation and stay away from the things that can be detrimental to his existence.

Tags how to tell if i am a masochist, masochism, sadism, sadist, sadomasochist | Permalink | Comment (0)

BDSM Pain & Torture

BDSM Movie Review – Brutality

May 16, 2012 – 1:32 am

Movie Title: Brutality
Released By: Shadow Slaves 2012
Starring: China & Magick

The movie Brutality from Shadow Slaves is not for the faint at heart. The slave girl China is in for a harsh and prolonged treatment in the dungeon as her master Magick subjects to a wide range of severe and extreme punishments. The intro of the movie Brutality is mainly about submission and humiliation of the english amateur slave girl, however the action soon turns extremely painful, dark and almost gore-ish. The highlights of the movie is an intense suspension bondage of the chubby slavegirl who receives one of the most intense upside down whipping punishments seen on film and taking her way into hellpain territory.

The action only get harder from there as China has her big tits needle tortured and skewered. The needles are used to nail her tits to a table, causing severe pain and restraining her from any movement. But it doesnt stop there. A stapler is used to force her mouth shot. This is true edge play and extreme bdsm as only real sadists and masochists would enjoy it. If youre a bit kinky and fancy a little bondage in the bedroom with your fluffy handcuffs, the movie Brutality is NOT for you. If on the other hand you love to see the edges of human sexuality and just how extreme some slave girls and masochist enjoy going, it doesnt get much better than this! It is pure sexual brutality and sadomasochism.

The technical quality of the movie is just about perfect with a full HD download option and crisp pictures of the sadomasochistic action. You will find this BDSM Movie at Shadow Slaves

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BDSM Bondage Pain & Torture

Guide To Maintaining BDSM Relationships

May 2, 2012 – 9:59 pm

Such relations that are only a sort of sexual pleasure may also at times lead to following of certain rules and guidelines. Though the BDSM only involves enjoyment of either party and pain to another but at the same time there are certain legal rules that both of them needs to abide by in order to undergo a safe process. A quick view of that is only provided in the paragraph below.

The actions of dominations and submission include a variety of tasks being performed. In such actions one has the control on the other. Physical activities play a major role for the task. However it does not needs that while performing physical tasks there had to be physical contact between the two persons in BDSM behavioral traits.

There are certain names which are being assigned to the persons involved such as the dominant is referred to as the tops where as the submissive persons are referred to as the bottoms. Surprisingly they are also assigned with nicknames which are differentiated on the basis of male and female. The males are called as doms where as the females are called the dommens. There are also some females who play only for money they are known as dominatrix.

The levels of intensity needs the couple to follows some of the most required practices which along with the involving dominance and submission also includes a range from the dominant ordering their “ slave ” around and ‘ forcing ’ them to perform certain activities, such as tied in the air, blindfolded, and whipped.

The distress or humiliation often includes the use of furniture or toilets, corporal punishment and may be forced depending on what the couple desires are. D and S relationships may also involve the degradation of the submissive partner where they may be treated as babies, dogs, or slaves, while the males might be subjected feminization. Sadism and masochism often goes hand-in-hand with domination and submission; dominant partners are known as sadists, and submissive are often masochists. Practices of bondage and discipline apply to satisfaction of any one of them. Sadists enjoy seeing their partners in pain or discomfort while masochists gain experience through the inflicted pain or discomfort.

However, there are many who refer to themselves as ‘switches ’. Whether in a romantic or sexual partnership, BDSM community always puts pressure on providing pleasure to any one of the party. The vast numbers of people who practice it following safe and legal measure are done unto the others. The use of safer language has become a very common practice whether be it in an emotionally or physically aroused situation. One may also make use of words that are generally used by people while sex to express feelings of pain or pleasure.

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BDSM Bondage Pain & Torture

Do I have a right to sexual dominance?

May 1, 2012 – 6:25 pm

Wow, just followed a friend to a post, which (as an aside) stated ‘a dom using BDSM for sexual gain has no right being a Dom’… Now I know BDSM isn’t always about sex, but are we at the point where sex is seen as a bad thing?

Personally, when I perform acts that could be considered BDSM in a non-professional setting and without specificly non-sexual guidelines, I try to turn my partner on. In fact I still do even in a professional setting, though in that case I don’t expect the effort to be reciprocated. If said partner is not previously a sexual partner this can often lead to sexual ‘gains’ (although I don’t generally think about sex in terms of gaining/losing, and would hope they get at least as much from the situation as I do)

So it would seem at least one viewpoint (and the OP did say it was just her point of view) would consider I had no right to ‘be’ a ‘Dom’

To be fair I guess I never really refer to myself as a Dom anyway, except in professional situations or where it’s the most suitable tickbox, but quite a few others do refer to me that way, and I’m not sure I’m comfortable with having my right to the title revoked purely because BDSM is usually sexual for me.

Is this a common view – has the community come to a place where people feel BDSM should never be seductive?

Photos by Shadow Slaves

I support the OP’s right to her opinion of course, and to be clear it was a journal entry and this point was not the focus of the post, but it always makes me wonder when someone’s opinion is that I should have less rights. Maybe the comment was out of context and intended to refer specifically to the situation she described, but I’d be interested to hear whether anyone shares this view.

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BDSM

BDSM in Fashion Trends

April 28, 2012 – 9:38 pm

Until recently, the BDSM concept unifying such practices as bondage, discipline, submission, domination, sadism and masochism, has been viewed as something indecent or illegal. However, it is now considered that any person is free to choose what behavior to adopt in his or her own sexual practice and if this choice is Safe, Sane and Consensual, there is nothing wrong about it. Such liberation of minds has given green light for BDSM subculture and so today there exist many BDSM communities with numerous followers all over the world. Communities of this kind have their own style of life, principles, rules, media and fashion.

BDSM, though criticized by society is considered legal in most countries. For the hundreds of years of its existence the BDSM culture has developed certain BDSM fashion trends that are now incorporated into the BDSM lifestyle. The BDSM fashion can vary among different communities including the gay and lesbian BDSM culture. Things commonly associated with the BDSM fashion plays are latex, rubber, spandex and fishnet. The most common being the leather style. Leather in BDSM fashion is a frequent theme of fetish photography. Items of clothing characterizing BDSM fashion are stiletto, boots, corsets and garters. Even edible items of clothing are available but are expensive. A special niche among BDSM fashion garment is taken by fashion accessories like collars, muzzles, cuffs, etc. These special fashion clothes not only create the specific atmosphere for the scene, but are also used for such BDSM practices as movement restriction, suspension, etc. Due to the increasing acceptance of BDSM, there are such dedicated fashion stores, libraries, movies and toys available in the market.

Representation of the BDSM emblem in clothing or accessories like rings and earrings is also a piece of BDSM artwork that can serve as a complementing detail to signal the affiliation with the BDSM subculture for those familiar with it. Another popular form of BDSM artwork is tattoo. Symbols like thorns, chains, spiny flowers can also witness to membership of their owners to some BDSM community.

Before going into BDSM, a few principles should be considered. The first one is common sense in BDSM. It is very important to observe basic safety rules, be responsible for your own behavior and be prepared for the consequences that BDSM practice may entail. In fact, BDSM can be really safe and satisfying or just as well dangerous and distressing if no due precautions are taken. The next concept to be viewed is negotiation. BDSM relationship requires absolute trust in your partner and to bring the pleasure it can bring BDSM character should be discussed. Agreement on safety words and taboos, share of needs, concerns and desires is sure to return in manifold. And the last thing is the awareness of freedom of choice. Whatever experts, movies or books say, it is a decision of one’s own, and it should be taken knowingly

Tags BDSM emblem, bdsm fashion, bdsm in mainstream media, fetish fashion | Permalink | Comment (0)

BDSM

How to address other doms / masters ?

April 16, 2012 – 5:51 pm

How to address other doms / masters ? How should a slave or submissive address a master or dominant that is not their own.

Well simply being polite and nice would be the first safe bet

That’s exactly right… if anyone other than your Master tells you you are doing it wrong they are being asshats

By Shadow Slaves BDSM Videos

Actually, further to my reply, obviously asking you not to use honorifics in the face of your usual instruction is a bit different… for instance if your Master tells you to call all male Doms ‘Sir’, then someone says they do not like it, it is of course good manners to respect that preference… the same does not go the other way though – if you are instructed to just be polite and another Dom says you should call him Sir or Master, just politely decline unless you want to and it’s cool with your Master.

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BDSM Pain & Torture

Labia Sewing / Labial Suturing

April 6, 2012 – 3:11 pm

I did my first actual labial suturing a few months back, and I have to say using a needle driver is trickier than it looks, so it’s worth wasting a couple of sutures to practice on an orange or similar just to get used to that and tying surgical knots.

Obviously if you are fluid bonded sterile gloves or or anti bac cleansed hands are an easier option than using a driver (which is of course not 100% sterile anyway once taken out of the pack in any environment but an operating theatre)

Ok, couldnt find the labia sewing photos, so here we have some stapling instead untill I dig them up – courtesy of Shadow Slaves

The other factors I noticed were that outer labia are much tougher than you might expect from experience with hypodermics, and suture needles are much more painful.

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Piercings or Body Mods as Punishment?

Finding A Sub or Dom ?

Real Dom or True Sub ?

How To Tell If I am a Masochist ?

BDSM Movie Review – Brutality

Guide To Maintaining BDSM Relationships

Do I have a right to sexual dominance?

BDSM in Fashion Trends

How to address other doms / masters ?

Labia Sewing / Labial Suturing

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