11.16.2012 Kim Kardashian took pictures at the Marine Corps Ball, then left

Some people were impressed when Kim Kardashian agreed to go with Sgt. Martin Gardner as his date to the 10th annual Marine Corps Ball in North Carolina last night, but those people are idiots because (unlike when Mila Kunis went) it was a completely selfish act for publicity. Kim only went to have pictures taken. According to the photo agency, these pictures were taken at 7:01, and she was gone by 9:04.

Even Justin Timberlake managed to do this right and he’s a complete douche. Not only that but Kim didn’t even tell the guy she was leaving, she just went to the bathroom and crawled out the window. If I were that guy Kanye would be getting some stubby Armenian fingers in the mail right now.

11.15.2012 Kristen Stewart was sexy, still boring

Do you have any idea how dull a girl has to be to wear an outfit that is skin tight AND see-through, and still be boring? Well you do now because Kristen Stewart did it last night at the London premiere of ‘Twilight: I Thought We Were Done With These’.

It didn’t help that she immediately went from “sexy movie star” right back to “schlumpy stoner”. I’ve never seen someone so attractive be so unsexy. Robert Pattinson is either blind or wears a strap-on.

(image source = getty, fame/flynet)

11.15.2012 Taylor Swift has truly worthless dating advice in Seventeen

Someone at Seventeen magazine saw Taylor Swift, who is 22 and a terrible girlfriend but acts like she’s 16 and a wonderful girlfriend, and thought she’d be a great choice to give dating advice to high school girls. It was not a great choice, and the result was predictably awful.

For example, her thoughts on what a girl should do if a guy only sees her as a friend:

“Don’t chance ruining your friendship by chasing him before he’s ready. You just have to wait for him to turn it into something more, if and when he wants to.”

Holy shit that is terrible fucking advice. Unless the reader is a fucking ghost trapped in her high school forever, screw that, just ask the guy out. In two years she’ll have moved away and have all new friends, she sure as fuck won’t be hanging out with any of her old guy friends, so just put on some slutty clothes and be aggressive.

Come to think of it that’s actually pretty good advice for girls in general.

(source = fox. image source = inf)

11.14.2012 Channing Tatum is apparently very handsome

People magazine announced today that Channing Tatum is this years Sexiest Man Alive, then later added, “no, seriously. His perpetually dumbfounded face is hot.” And if you were under the impression that Channing Tatum is kinda dumb, they included a delightful story to confirm that.

“My first thought was, ‘Y’all are messing with me,’” says Tatum, who married actress Jenna Dewan-Tatum in 2009. “I told Jenna after we’d been in the bathtub washing our dogs because they’d gotten skunked.”
“She was like, ‘What?’”
“Yeah, she calls me [the Sexiest Man Alive] now,” he adds.

Holy shit. How boring was the rest of the interview if People printed that? Even for an actor, Channing Tatum seems dumb. They could have talked to that gorilla that knows sign language and gotten better quotes.