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Posted on March 8, 2013 by Patrick in Graffiti, Knobism, North, People, Shit London Photo | Leave a comment
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Spacey, Seven Sisters Rd

We’ve all woken up at some point in our life with a knob drawn on our head after a night on the sauce. In pre-internet days these kind of incidents usually stayed amongst a small group of friends but with the advent of social media increasingly peoples shame is broadcast for the whole world to see. It’s must be even more embarrassing if you are major Hollywood star and this happens to you. Here we have evidence of Kevin Spacey out on a drunken rampage around Seven Sisters Road where he not only has a classic “cock n’ balls” emblazoned across his forehead but also seems to make the admission that his balls are bigger than his “peeny.” The usually eloquent Mr Spacey also throws all the rules of grammar out of the window in his admission, another sign that he is hog whimperlingly swigfaced.

Spotted by Ariel King

Posted on March 7, 2013 by Patrick in Bleak, London Papers, Shit London Photo, South | Leave a comment
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Headline, Upper Norwood

I love it when you see a newspaper headline so arresting that it slaps you about the face and takes you a few seconds to actually process what you’ve just read. This headline has it all, tragedy, obesity and sky diving, the holy triumvirate. It’s the kind of story that only comes along once in a journalists career. This manages to be both funny and deeply sad simultaneously. It’s such an improbable collection of words to see together on a headline board that it’s easy to forget that this represents something that happened to a real person in what was almost certainly quite an upsetting experience for somebody already under a cloud of grief. There are organs of mine that have just aged 5 years just by restraining my impulse to laugh at this but my conscience  (that do gooding, butter-wouldn’t-melt swine) is telling me I shouldn’t, I’m worried enough about the state of my soul as it is.

Rarely have I felt so torn.

Spotted by Tim Gee

Posted on March 7, 2013 by Patrick in Misspelt, North, Shit London Photo, Shops, Signs | Leave a comment
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Something Yellow, Kilburn

Hopefully this is just a typo but I’m sufficiently ill educated in the world of bridal wear to wonder whether this might actually be a thing. Going to the loo whilst wearing a wedding dress can’t be the easiest (I’ve watched enough Big Fat Gypsy Weddings to ascertain that) so I’m wondering if an enterprising dress designer has solved this problem by using the space available underneath the skirt to install some kind of elegant and discreet plumbing system for that special day.

Answers on a postcard please

Spotted by Natasha Magennis

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Posted on March 7, 2013 by Patrick in North, Shit London Photo, Weird | Leave a comment
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Sadists Van, Swiss Cottage

Pain and friendly advice aren’t two things you’d immediately associate with each other. In fact they seem totally at odds. The whole idea of friendly advice to give advice in a manner that puts the advisee at ease, in a mental place that’s comfortable and leaves the advisee open to new concepts and idea. This would all be ruined if say you went to visit a friendly lifestyle coach and they said “Nice to meet you, we’re going to work through some of your problems today and see if we can get you back on track….the one thing is, and I know this might sound unusual, you are going to have to be flogged mercilessly with barbed wire throughout the entire session. I know it sounds weird but the orders come from above, it’s out of my hands I’m afraid”

Spotted by Andy Issac

Posted on March 7, 2013 by Patrick in Graffiti, Shit London Photo, South | Leave a comment
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Protest, Honor Oak Park

 

Shit Londoner Rose Chorlton sent this in from the front line of the battle to save the high street…

“Sorry for the bad quality but thought I should send this picture. You’ll need a little backstory to it though.

This grafiti has been sprayed onto the hoarding for where they are planning to build a Sainsbury’s local in Honor Oak Park. There has been much ‘protest’ about this (despite there being nothing of the sort in HOP), but they just love protesting (recently Domino’s was blocked from opening in the high street due to “the noise pollution from the motorcycles and the unhealthy lifestyle choices Domino’s represents”!). This particularly middle class quote from Richard III I loved best.”

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