Find Out How To Recover From A Horrendous Initial Big Date
You know the feeling. You shut the door behind you and let out a huge sigh. It didn't go well. The truth is, it was a disaster.
First dates are stressful even when every little thing goes right. When you or the other individual messes up, a couple hours can feel like an eternity. But after the date is over, what you do next can etch the bad experience into your mind or allow you to overcome it.
Listed here are some things you can do to recover from a disastrous initial date.
1. Forgive yourself.
Most of us, when under stress, do things we would not normally do. If you talked too much - or not enough - when you laughed too much, if you overreacted to a certain statement, or if you behaved in a way that was out of character for you personally, do not beat yourself up.
We're often tougher on ourselves than we would be on another person. Show a bit of compassion toward yourself. Acknowledge that you simply did the very best you could under the circumstances. Admit that it is natural to feel nervous on an initial date.
Remember that no one is perfect, and if you didn't act like you should have, it is not the end of the world. Be kind to yourself by not falling in the self-punishment trap.
It is important to recognize that negative reaction and cut it off as rapidly as possible. When you can't seem to be objective about it, discuss it with a trusted friend.
2. Forgive the other person.
For anyone who is a decent judge of character, you can usually tell when an individual was motivated by nervousness or lack of self-confidence. Just as you shouldn't be too harsh on yourself, you shouldn't beat up the other individual either.
3. Be ready to move on.
If you did something awkward or that warrants an apology, sending flowers is actually a polite thing to do. And yes, men really like to receive flowers!
4. Don't let the experience influence your self-confidence.
See yourself as a worthwhile, appealing person. You've got a lot of good qualities, and just because this individual didn't recognize them, that does not mean there isn't someone else out there who can.
If the other individual does not want to see you again, they represent only their opinion, not everyone's of the opposite sex. Someone who believes in themselves exudes an attractiveness that can't be faked.
5. Look for the lesson.
You are usually a work-in-progress. Wisdom is the sum of knowledge and experience, so take these two and figure out what you can learn from that first date.
6. Learn how to spot a player.
There's absolutely nothing worse than dating a player and then being in love with one. Find out if he is a player by searching for tips on the internet. You'll find warnings signs that you can look for to protect yourself.
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