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MailBoss: The Mailbox Baseball Cure

spacer 12-26-2008 | spacer by T | spacer Category Consumer Information, Just for Fun, Mail Boss Features | spacer 8 Comments »

For those of you looking to establish a baseball bat cemetery in your front yard, look no further! Mail Boss security mailboxes will manifest your suburban revenge fantasy. Bolt down a post mount Mailboss and expect zero buyer’s remorse. Your purchase will have mailbox vandals limping off dejected, and keep them away for good!

(DISCLAIMER: We do not recommend attempting to vandalize the Mail Boss locking mailbox with a baseball bat or other object of any kind. Severe injury to the vandal will most likely occur.)

Mailbox baseball or “mailboxing” is the act of using a baseball bat or other objects to knock over, dent, or smash roadside mailboxes by a passenger in a car.

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It can either be played as a game with score kept similar to baseball, or just done for fun. Either way, it is vandalism and destruction of other peoples’ property. Here is an example of mailbox baseball courtesy of YouTube and some small-minded hooligans:

Mailbox baseball is depicted in the movies Stand by Me, The Benchwarmers, and Dazed and Confused (with a trash can). It is also depicted briefly in an episode of Family Guy, an episode of Freaks and Geeks, a deleted scene in Juno, and the episode of The Simpsons in which Dr. Hibbert and Dr. Nick were not available due to the fact that they were destroying mailboxes with a golf club.

Mailbox baseball is quite a common problem, and plagues homeowners from coast to coast. Below are some related news stories, articles, and forums about mailbox baseball in neighborhoods across the nation:

  • “‘Mailbox Baseball: A Common Phenomenon”
  • “Mailbox Baseball Being Played in St. Leonard”
  • “The Mailbox and the Baseball Bat”
  • “Nasty Mr. Baseball Bat…”
  • “Revenge of the Mailbox: Mailbox Baseball”
  • “Tips for preventing mailbox vandalism”
  • “Mailbox Baseball”
  • “Baseball Bat Punks…”

It is somewhat surprising that mailbox baseball has become so popular, especially since vandalizing a mailbox is considered a federal crime. (18 USC § 1705 states that it is a federal crime to damage a mailbox or to tamper with the mail contained inside. Any mailbox is considered federal property.)

So why is mailbox vandalism so prevalent? For one, these mailbox baseball bashers are about as sharp as marbles and were most likely cut from the local high school freshman baseball team. In addition, even though the mailbox is considered federal property, generally the crime is not considered serious enough for the authorities to take serious action.

To stop mailbox baseball from happening to your mailbox, it is in your best interest to make your own moves. In return for your hard earned dough, the MailBoss will not only protect you from vandalism but will also grant you many joyful, triumphant, and entertaining memories for a lifetime to share and embrace.

The Mail Boss locking security mailbox is constructed of 14 gauge electro galvanized welded steel. It is an impenetrable fortress weighing in at 40 pounds. All MailBoss accessories are heavy welded steel specifically design for your security and peace of mind. Matching posts, surface-mount plates, and the new newspaper holder are all made of thick welded steel.

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