Rod Stewart addresses stomach pump urban legend
October 26, 2012
After decades of ignoring it, Rod Stewart has finally addressed his urban legend.
The story went (completely true, my older brother told me) that Rod Stewart got sick after a concert and had to get his stomach pumped — and it turned out he had swallowed a quart of cum.
Snopes.com says that this urban legend has been told about many different artists, but it was always Rod Stewart when I heard it.
In his new autobiography, Stewart claims that a fired publicist disseminated the story as revenge in 1982.
And Gawker has a video clip of Stewart telling the same story to pervy Katie Couric.
Several Gawker commenters dispute the year, insisting that the story dates to the 1970s. That’s my recollection too. I was in college in 1982, and I’m pretty sure I heard this story in high school or junior high.
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Sofia Vergara tweets her own wardrobe malfunction
September 24, 2012
Sofia Vergara tweeted this photo last night with the message “Yes!!!! This happend 20 min before we won!!!! Jajajajja. I luv my life!!!!”
At the risk of sounding crass or mean toward a celeb who doesn’t really deserve it … what the hell is that piece of green fabric hanging from her butt cheeks? It doesn’t seem to be connected to the dress itself.
I’m gonna start saying “Jajajajja” when I’m happy. Now I just have to figure out how to pronounce it.
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Adult Press Release of the Week
September 18, 2012
Received over the weekend:
Los Angeles, Calif. – (September 13, 2012) – September marks Women of Achievement month, a time when organizations across the country recognize the finest accomplishments of women in industry, culture and public service. Wicked Pictures is joining the conversation this week with the release of jessica drake’s Guide to Wicked Sex: G-Spot and Female Ejaculation.
Congratulations!
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Prince Harry scandal
August 22, 2012
Can someone explain this scandal to me? A famous person was naked in his own hotel room. Some asshole snapped some photos. Said asshole sold the photos to some other assholes, who published the photos. Still more assholes republished the photos and tsktsked the famous person for his shockingly immoral behavior.
I have a confession to make.
I too have been naked in hotel rooms. I have taken showers in hotel rooms, totally naked. I have walked around hotel rooms naked even after finishing my shower. I have gotten naked and masturbated in hotel rooms. I have gotten naked and had sex with other naked people in hotel rooms.
Admittedly I’ve never played strip billiards with mystery women in a Las Vegas VIP suite, but I wouldn’t pass up the chance. Any takers?
This scandal raises all sorts of tricky ethical questions which I’m wholly unqualified to judge. But here’s my view anyway: between (a) the person who walked around his hotel room naked, (b) the person who secretly snapped photos and (c) the people who purchased and published the photos, the naked guy deserves tsktsking least.
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Fred Willard arrested at Tiki Theater
July 20, 2012
Fred Willard was arrested wednesday night for (allegedly) jacking off in the Tiki Theater in Los Angeles. Christine Pelisek at The Daily Beast has the best coverage: The Tale Behind Fred Willard’s Arrest in an Adult Film Theater.
Everyone’s first question is, Why would anyone go to a movie theater to jack off in 2012? Who knew that XXX movie theaters still existed? My best guess is there’s some retro appeal, like middle-class women who make their own soap.
According to Cinema Treasures, the Tiki Theater is “the only theatre showing straight porn in the greater metropolitan Los Angeles area. Screening video/DVD on a very small screen, it use to have girls stripping between triple-features, but no longer.”
Tiki Theater, Los Angeles
A nearly exact replica shows up in Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas.
Tiki Theater in Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
If the LAPD has its way, the Tiki Theater won’t be around much longer. From the Daily Beast story:
“Police come here for routine checking,” says Jafor, a native of Bangladesh who sits in a cloudy glass ticket booth at the front of the theater house, handing patrons a yellow ticket good for four hours before they step through the turnstile (the sign above reads “Money No Back”). “They [police] have come here many many times. Sometimes four or five times a week. They are checking to see if people are drinking or jacking off.”
Jafor says police have stopped by the theater more than 40 times since Nov. 26, 2011, and have arrested 23 people. “It has happened many, many times,” he says. “Sometimes we see pants open.”
According to TMZ, Willard might beat the rap based on the wording of the California anti-public-jackoff law, which makes it illegal only within view of people who “might be offended”. The other four patrons of the Tiki Theater were unlikely to be offended by a fellow nostalgic raincoater, reasons TMZ.
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Metalocalypse Slash
July 16, 2012
If, like Daze, you’re reeling from last night’s Metalocalypse season finale, try soothing the long wait for season five with the brutally intimate fanfic at SlashKlok.
Metalocalypse slash. I had no idea this existed, but I’m so happy it does.
Non-surprising revelation: everybody wants to fuck Toki.
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Fifty Shades of Grey Porn Parodies, Continued
July 13, 2012About six weeks ago, Daze Reader surveyed sundry Fifty Shades of Grey porn parodies in the works. Everything in that post is now wrong. Here we’ll survey the current state of FSoGPPdom, before the porn biz changes its collective mind yet again. Adult Source Media first announced plans to make a XXX version of Fifty [...]
Sexual Tension Demotivational Posters
June 29, 2012Do people still make demotivational posters? They’ve been around since the meme stone age. Still, the Sexual Tension submeme was new to me, and a few made me laugh. When will someone make an Archie Comics porn parody already?
Fossilized Turtle Sex at Messel Pit
June 27, 2012Amazing archaeological find at the Messel Pit in Germany: Turtle sex act frozen in time, “the first known case of animals with backbones found copulating in the fossil record”. Diggers have found nine pairs of turtles in mating poses at the site. Does this mean that both turtle sex partners died during or right after [...]
Game of Thrones sex and nudity compilation
June 26, 2012Courtesy of Huffington Post and AOL On, someone has spliced together every bit of nudity and/or sex from the first two seasons of Game of Thrones. Since AOL and HBO are part of the same media conglomerate, I assume this compilation is semi-authorized. Now someone please, please, please tell me that there’s a corresponding True [...]
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