I am so tired these days Josh, what is the deal. I KNOW you think it’s just a symptom of my depression, but does it have to be that? Is any misalignment from the norm automatically attributable to depression? And besides isn’t being tired the norm so who are you to cast aspersions? I figure my being so tired all the time is just due to the pain of living or whatever. Life went septic at some point in the past year, with the nuclear money and American realpolitik and the blogger-on-blogger pout-a-thons. It’s a lot for one person. It’s a lot for all of us.

On top of which, there’s never been so much to stay awake for! The internet! Josh! Facebook is hell of calling my name at 11 o’clock every night. People have statuses: attention must be paid. Some dudes are posting covers of Red House Painters songs to YouTube: I need to be there to offer discouragement. Messrs Kottke and Gruber are posting links, for real, like EVERY DAY. What happens if I don’t click on them? I don’t want to find out, and neither do you. It’s a wonder I get any sleep at all. I should be lauded.

My primary caffeinatory vehicle remains coffee. I find that one cup a day is about all the gut can manage, but that’s enough to get me through most of the morning. Awesome! Great job everyone, let’s go home. But what’s this? There’s more to the day, turns out. Is Google to blame, somehow?

Back in the days I would reach to Red Bull for the assist, but it’s a tongue-stab of a flavor, best left to youthful risk-embracers. Then I think I was on Rock Star for a while? Did I review it? Quick check of the archive says Negatory, so I guess that period of my life can’t truly be said to exist.

So it’s been with great interest that I’ve turned to the more juiced-out energy drinks lately. Don’t the silver foxes at Metamucil recommend mixers for their fine product? Why should my taurine, glucose, guarana, ginseng, niacinamide, l-carnitine, inositol, and glucuronolactone arrive any differently.

I’ve had all the versions of juice-infused Monster recently. I can’t precisely recall which one was which and I’m 90% sure it won’t end up mattering, at least on this plane of existence. One is sort of orange drink-y? I think? One has pineapple, definitely. One is purple. I think I liked that one the least. The other one, I don’t know. I want to say reddish? But more like the idea of red than the flavor. The marketing concept. Anyways.

The point is I’m here, awake. Updating my website. Participating in the online dialogue. Generating content. Offering all of you who are still sitting in front of your monitors at this late hour justification for doing so. I am now free of my obligations for the evening; who knows where the internet will take me next. My bed is cold but my laptop is warm. There’s a Netflix queue to reorganize. There are female celebrities struggling to retain some shred of dignity as they emerge from cars. There is music to steal from bands I wouldn’t want in my house, and high-poly photographs of meals I’m not interested in eating. I’m up, let’s freaking do this.