"Can I Kiss You?" If you were like me, you probably received the index card with information about the show and a Hershey's Kiss taped to it in your mailbox. It looked like it was going to be just another show about safe dating. But as I found out when I got to the Arena Theater, Mike Domitrz's presentation is actually quite awesome.

Mike Domitrz is an expert on the subjects of consent and sexual assault who travels all over the country giving presentations about approaching intimacy to colleges and high schools. The talk started out humorous, as he asked a volunteer to give his best rendition of the Look. Hilarity ensued. Then he role-played a couple trying to figure out how to put the moves on each other without looking like idiots. Domitrz and a girl volunteer had just come back from a date, and they were sitting together on the porch of her house. The first scenario was called "The movie version," in which Domitrz used a truly execrable pickup line to try to get a kiss. On the second attempt, perfectly rendering the sweaty hands and nervous fidgeting of a guy on a date, Domitrz said, "You know, before you go in, I'd like to give you a kiss." It worked.

After we guffawed at the awkward couple, he moved into the truly serious issues of rape.

The message of his presentation is that sexual assault is any sexual contact given without consent. He outlined several ways to ask for and give consent on a date. You don't have to look like an idiot, and it's the right thing to do.

Domitrz's website, www.canikissyou.com, has information about his presentation as well as two books for sale. The first one, May I Kiss You? is a book form of the Can I Kiss You presentation. The second, Voices of Courage, consists of the stories of twelve survivors of sexual assault, written by the survivors themselves. Also check out the Resources link on the site. It contains a generous collection of links to sexual assault hotlines, support networks, and books and articles on the subject.

Images

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  Presentation
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  The arena theater

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