Every year, I give in and participate in Goodreads’ Annual Reading Challenge. This year, I went with 40 books since I failed the 2014 challenge to read 45. Here’s what I have devoured this year:

1. Etiquette & Espionage (Finishing School) I figured I’d start with a familiar book and was in the mood for light and fluffy. This hit the spot. I found it to be a really fun YA book and enjoyed the concept of girls training as spies and boys as evil geniuses. Bonus Points: My son read it and loved it.
2. A Fighting Chance Great book! I love her writing style and I am on the same page as her with the issues. I found her work to be super fascinating to read about as well as her path to Congress. I really, really like her and hope her story and her experience motivates more women to get involved in politics.
3. The Ghost Brigades (Old Man’s War) I actually had to go back and re-read Old Man’s War because I forgot absolutely everything I read in that book when I read it two years ago. Some serialized books, that’s not necessary but I felt that with this one, it was. It was as fun a read the second time around even as some of hte twists and turns came back to my brain. I have the next three books in this series and do plan on getting to those this year.
4. Lock In You know what you read when you finish a book by Jon Scalzi? Another book by Jon Scalzi. This one was actually a bok for my Book Club and I really enjoyed it. One thing that we agreed on in our discussion was that this book could have gone way deeper. This first book felt a bit shallow as far as development is concerned. Scalzi has some AMAZING ideas in here and this book went SUPER fast. It was definitely the kind of book you’d wish you could really immerse yourself into a bit more which is interesting given what the book is about.
5. Lost in Temptation (Regency Chase Family Series, Book 1) Thanks to Nicole and Maggie, 2015 will likely be the year of the Regency Romance. These books are like potato chips– you can’t read just one. This was the first book of this kind I’ve read and it was good enough to set me off in search of more like it, which I did largely by perusing this post by Nicole and Maggie.
6. The Book of Life (All Souls) I read book one in November 2012. I read book two in May 2013. This one got read in March 2015. Overall, it’s completely entertaining. I couldn’t put it down once it really got revving. I did have a hard time with the beginning because it has been a couple of years since I had read book two but necessary things clicked into place well enough. These books are just so massive that I really think they’re best read together in one go instead of spaced years apart. I feel like I missed things and probably would have felt more satisfied with the ending had I read them back to back. I think authors who write these mega stories don’t realize how easy it is for readers to lose track for the stories or to even have their feelings for characters change and fade. The authors live with these characters and stories. It’s different for readers especially for readers like me who just aren’t big into re-reading. I say go for it but try and get them all read in the same year.
7. Curtsies & Conspiracies (Finishing School) We continued with Gail Carriger’s Finishing School and continue to be highly entertained. I think my son read this one in one single day. I’m enjoying the characters as they get older and progress through their training. Such a fun series. This reminds me that I need to request the third one!
8. Simply Perfect (Simply Quartet) A thing that happens to me when I randomly pick up books at libraries is that I sometimes have a tough time telling if a story is part of a series and where it’s place in a series is. This is what happened when I picked up Simply Perfect. That being said, it didn’t matter AT ALL that this is the 4th book in a series and I’ve read not one of them. The Regency Romance continues with this one. Sometimes, you’re in the mood for unlikely characters, plot twists, and unrealistic happy endings. Sometimes you want to indulge in a world that is simply perfect because the one we live in isn’t. And when that is what you crave, a book like this hits the spot.
9. More than a Mistress MORE REGENCY ROMANCE! This one was pretty fun and extra unlikely and extra scandalous because of the plot twist in it. I highly recommend this one for reading in a hammock, or a bathtub, or in a bed on a stormy day. Might also be fun on a plane but I don’t know because I haven’t been on one of those in years so I’m out of touch.
10. No Man’s Mistress You know what’s better than one Regency Romance novel in a book? TWO REGENCY ROMANCE NOVELS IN THE SAME BOOK. The story continues with MORE scandalous behavior from this crew. There was a great quote in this one that I’m sad I didn’t write down. The female character says something like “We are not respectable, but we are respected.” That pretty much sums up the funness of this cast of characters perfectly.
11. Nine Rules to Break When Romancing a Rake (Love By Numbers) Apparently Regency Romances are highly contagious. As somewhat of a joke, I tossed this one as a suggestion at our Book Club meeting and it WON! My friends are cooler than yours. This by far was the steamiest of the Regency books I’ve read. Like WHOA MOMMA aren’t you totally improper right now? This one was by far my favorite. The main character was buckets of fun. The sexy stuff was tres sexy. While I do have another Mary Balogh waiting for me on my nightstand, I can tell you that I am MOST interested in reading more by Sarah MacLean.
12. Bite Me: A Love Story This is another situation where I wandered through the library and found this book and was like, “OK I’ve read Christopher Moore, let’s read more.” And then when I logged onto Goodreads to tell the world how I felt about it, I found out it’s book 3 of a series. So, the thing with this book is that for the first several pages I doubted my ability to read it. The main character is Abby Normal who is a perky goth teenager. The book is written from her POV and it’s um overwhelming to deal with at first– especially as there is an attempt to catch a reader up in a rapid fire manner. I’ll probably maybe try and read the others in the series because I do appreciate how ridiculous Moore’s books are.
13. Caramelo So, the second time I went into the library for a stroll I took a different approach. This time, I opened my Goodreads app on my phone, pulled up my To-Read list which is way too long for life, sorted it by author, and went to the Fiction section. I started with A and went through looking specifically for female or non-white male authors because I really do enjoy diversity in my reading selections and it’s easy to get stuck reading a bunch of white guys. This is the first book I read from this trip and boy am I thrilled to bits. Really beautiful story that is truly woven masterfully. There are lots of layers, lots of designs. So much ties together, and often in subtle ways that don’t really occur to you right away. They’re more like an after taste if you will. This is the kind of book that reminds me a great story is wonderful but a great story that is beautifully written is a treasure.
14. The Alchemist Another book from my library quest, this is one I’ve waited too long to read and am so glad that I finally did. This is seriously a modern classic. I read this in one sitting pretty much. It’s a perfect story and one that I would LOVE to own because I feel like the re-readability is high as heck on this one with lots of pretty things to find every time. Gr eat, inspiring quotes abound in this one. Give this to someone who is lost. It will light the way.
15. The Secret Life of Bees This one is another from by recent library quest. I’m glad I’m finally getting to these. Apparently, this one has been sitting in my To-Read list since 2011!! I liked this one as well. It’s a really pretty story, the kind of book you can easily drink in on a lazy day- maybe in a hammock with some iced tea.

Right now, I’m reading Middlesex which is another book that has been sitting on my To-Read list for way too long. This came from my library quest as well and even though I don’t think the author counts as a non-white author, I felt that the simple fact the main character was intersex made it worth adding to my list. I’m not too far into it and have found that I’m not as entralled as I thought that I might be. I’m actually in the part of the book where things are weird with the grandparents. I’ve been reading it in slow bites although I’m totally intrigued.

What are you reading?? Have you recently read anything totally awesome that I should add to my list?

Hi everyone! This is just a quick post to let you know that I will be participating in this Sunday’s Autism Speaks walk here in Miami. I set myself the very amibitious fundraising goal of $500 and have just 2 days left.

I am hoping that maybe you’ll be in the mood to do a Random Act of Kindness for a stranger and make a donation no matter how small to this fantastic organization. I am walking in support of my boyfriend’s niece and nephew. This is a great cause as Autism affects so many people. The research that has been coming out has been incredible and so many advancements have been made. Your support keeps these developments going.

So, please do consider making a donation today. Maybe pass on a snack or a drink or a treat and put your $5, $10, $15 to use!

Thank you from the bottom of my mutated heart!

A few weeks ago, I realized something really interesting– adults are always telling young people and children that they can’t possibly know what they really want and who they really are because of how young they are. They haven’t lived life, how on Earth do they know what they’re made of? They haven’t been tested.

And yet it occurs to me that this is precisely why young people, especially children, know themselves better than we as adults do. I think that there is this interesting thing that happens to us in life. We start out young and amazing. We know exactly who we are. We know what we like. We know what we don’t like. And we live our lives. Changing your opinion is natural and easy– one day you like pink and then suddenly purple is the best color EVER and that’s that. You don’t like spinach and suddenly you do. Changing your mind isn’t a crisis and people don’t freak out about it– calling you out for flip-flopping on your views or pointing out “But the other day you said…”.

But then we get older and people start telling us “You don’t know who you even are” and we believe it I think. Not at first, because we are REALLY confident when we are younger. But definitely later, especially when life starts getting harder. Cruelty comes up. Fights happen. You cry a lot. Things don’t make sense the way they used to. And suddenly, for some of us more than others, other people’s opinions matter– a lot. And that’s when things get really scary and complicated because you suddenly realize– you DON’T know who you are because you tucked yourself away to proctect yourself.

It happens in different ways and at different times. Bullying in middle and high school really get things going. And I mean real bullying not this crazy crap where some kid teases you one day and makes you cry and everyone freaks out. I mean the relentless kind of bullying that happens almost every single day for a year, two years, three… And then, getting involved in toxic relationships which is easy to do when you’ve panicked and hidden yourself away.

Before you know it, you’re in your thirties and you’re clearing the rubble, shining around your flashlight wondering, “Where are you? You can come out, now it’s ok. I get it now. It’s safe. You can’t get hurt anymore because I finally GET IT. They don’t matter, you matter. Where are you?”

You tune your ears to the sound of your heart and you begin to pay attention for even the lightest of whispers. You follow the sound, and it gets louder and louder.

Of course, there are still other voices and it’s hard to drown them out entirely because for years you listened to them more than you listened to yourself. And yeah sometimes the doubt creeps back in but it’s ok.

Me. Finding me in my thirties. How the hell is that even a thing? And yet it must happen all of the time. I imagine people who go through a mid-life crisis do so because their hearts just burst after being trapped for so long and chaos blows in. It’s as if it’s screaming “I’M IN HERE YOU IDIOT! SAVE ME!”

The thing is, tracking myself down again, following the clues, it’s fun. It’s not painful or sad or anything like that. It’s fun and happy and that’s how you know you’re on the right path. You’re around the right people. You’re listening to the right music. You’re reading the right books and watching the right shows. You’re doing the right things. For you.

And it seems silly to think that things like going to musicals, and dyeing your hair, and listening to music could you lead you to you and they’re not really but they help. They make things comfortable. They recreate a time when you were more SURE. They help you remember what it was like when you listened to yourself more than ANYONE else.

So, today being in touch with me means singing along to ska music. Last night, it meant playing with watercolors. The other day, it meant staying in bed with books most of the day and then staying up way past my bedtime lost in a great story. The day before that it meant going to a salon and finally (FINALLY) doing something fun with my hair (hello hot pink ombre).

It means standing up for myself and for my kids. It means loving them and cuddling them and talking with them when they are worried or frustrated or confused. It means watching and listening to them proudly.

It’s pretty cool being me. I like it. I like it a lot.

I like making things. And that is probably the most obvious sentence I’ve ever typed right there. But anyways, yes, I like to make things. The thing is, that when it comes to making things I tend to be majorly Scanner about it. I find a thing that I want to make, I teach myself how to make it, I practice, and then I do it a lot until I get tired of it and stop.

Prior examples include tutus, crochet, knitting, scrapbooks, collage, art trading cards, and embroidery. I am sure there have been others but those are the ones I can remember.

Right now, it’s doodling. I don’t really draw because I don’t really know how and I don’t have that gift that comes to others. I get frustrated with my drawings. But I bought a book called Zen Doodling and I looked up something called Zentangle and Doodling on Pinterest. I exchanged some yarn I had bought for my niece for some drawing supplies and dug in. It was fun! And a friend doodled with me and that was fun too! So lately I’ve been doodling a bit each night and it’s very soothing.

I have noticed that I need to be in a specific state of mind though. I get frustrated if I get interrupted or if I have to keep putting it down. I like to be able to just drown in it, like when I read a book. I have two main exercises that I do. One is I bought a small watercolor sketch pad that is basically 6″ square pages. I use those to do a full piece. The other is an old sketchpad that I have that is more standard size. I use those to explore and practice patterns. So I trace 9 circles on a page and I do a pattern in each one. This comes in handy when I am doing a full piece and am stumped on what to fill in a segment with. Right now, I can tell I’m a rookie because a lot of it doesn’t come organically to me. I don’t really like the patterns that I make up on my own as much as I like the patterns I have found in a book or online. My guess is that intuitiveness comes with practice and confidence. But I really do enjoy it so hooray for making things.

What are you making these days?