Our Jewish Family Is Celebrating Christmas This Year
It’s time to order holiday cards!
Let me help- enter my $200 giveaway with Minted!
I’m wrapped up in coffee and sugar and knotted pine. Cups clink as customers order and waiters murmur.
Kayli and Chloe and Brody beam into their hot chocolates and croissants. The sunshine, November’s gift to Minnesota, beams into them.
Jason and I take in the crumbs sweetening their lips and the powdered sugar gracing their fingertips. We bite back the urge to pass out napkins.
Sitting up straight, he starts. “We want to talk to you guys about something.” Shoulders back, elbows planted, smile crooked.
Chloe and Brody sip and chew and dig for chocolate.
But Kayli stills. Her impossibly cocoa eyes search my face, her mouth sets.
I lace my fingers around my mug. Breathing in the hazelnut and seeping in the warmth, I meet her eyes.
“Our family celebrates Hanukkah, but Daddy grew up celebrating Christmas. He wants to share that with us.”
I sip my coffee, but it’s them I’m drinking in.
Chloe’s eyes light, “With a tree?”
Brody announces, “Chocolate croissant!” His voices travels far.
Kayli stays quiet.
In my hand I hold what I know and think and feel.
This is new. (I’m scared of change.)
Others hold Christmas in a different light. (Be respectful of that.)
Daddy was only twenty three when he converted. (That’s not what this is about.)
Neither one of us believes that anything is predetermined. (Or final.)
I hold these pieces of my heart closer, they are gifts for another day.
What I splay is this, “We love Daddy and we want to share his whole story.”
We laugh about Daddy as a Star Wars loving little boy.
Chloe asks about presents and pretties.
Kayli asks about cookies and decorating.
Brody crawls into my lap. I nestle his weight against me. His blond locks tickle my chin.
Change is hard, family is soft.
Comments
Love. My Jewish family (me) started celebrating many moons ago, and there are absolutely many ways to make it work. I have no doubt that you and yours will do the same. Let me know if you want to talk about it at all – more directly. Huge hugs to you, sweet mama.
Great post! I think there are definitely ways to celebrate both holidays – either religiously or culturally. We are a Jewish house and our daughter is raised Jewish (goes to Jewish preschool). But we still honor my husband’s traditions of family Christmases and memories. And I’m the worst — I already started listening to Christmas music!
I think it’s beautiful that you’re sharing traditions with your children. I love the last line, beautiful.
I come from a family who shared both traditions and cultures with us and am now doing the same for our children. I think what you’re doing is great, though I totally understand the fear of change.
I think you are giving your children so much more than just a new holiday to celebrate, you are giving them an opportunity to really experience another tradition from the inside. I think it is brave and wonderful. I know I would be nervous if it were me, wondering if I am doing it correctly, etc. but I know you will handle it gracefully.
I look forward to hearing all about it!
Change is always hard but I’m sure you and Jason will do a great job of blending the two holidays for the children in a way that seems natural for your family.
Change is always hard! My husband and I are 2 different religions and 2 different cultures and it is always hard to try and find a balance. It is important for us that we teach our kid(s) all aspects of their culture and heritage. I admire you for doing both! I know you will find a great balance.
I love this. Nothing is “final.”
You will find a way to make it work, and yes, nothing is final. All the best with your planning and with the change.
Now I am curious, although I know Christmas is not part of Jewish celebrations, I realize I have never questioned why. But Hanukkah is around the same time of the year, yes?
I think it’s wonderful. My husband used to work for a Jewish family who held an unapologetic Christmas party for their employees. It wasn’t just a way to be inclusive with their mostly gentile staff–they simply loved Christmas. They never said, “Happy Holidays” or “Season’s Greetings” they said, “Merry Christmas”. They celebrated it in their home because they loved the tree and the carols and the other festivities of the season. Why not?
Besides, doesn’t it make sense that a Jewish family would celebrate the birthday of one of the most famous Jewish people in history?
I’ve often thought it strange that we (I’m Catholic) don’t celebrate Jewish holidays. After all, Jesus did.
Party on!
Changes are always a bit uncomfortable but sharing their dad’s culture and history is priceless. I look forward to reading more about this experience.
Great post! Christmas has evolved so far away from its original meaning that for many people today, it’s more about the tree and the music and the gifts than anything truly Christian (please don’t attack me for this, but it’s become such a commercial and cultural holiday rather than a spiritual one). Santa Claus didn’t come out of the bible (yes, I know, Saint Nick).
I will never forget my second year in college: two Catholic roommates, one Jewish one, and me: not raised in any religion, though Christmas was always celebrated. We agreed we were going to celebrate both Christmas and Hanukkah in our apartment, and were going to bring everything we needed back from Thanksgiving. Unfortunately our Jewish roommate didn’t end up bringing anything, and I think we were all disappointed, since we wanted to experience something new. But I remember how excited she was about our little tree with lights. And I see the tree as a cultural tradition, more than a religious one. (Just wait until you smell the tree in your house!)
It’s lovely that you’re opening up your family to new traditions. Enjoy!
I really respect you for opening up your children’s minds to a different tradition than the one they’re used to. I understand how scary doing something different could be, especially in the beginning. But your decision to go ahead and celebrate Christmas showed that not only you respect your husband’s roots, but by doing that you also showed your children to embrace different cultures and religions. Not many have that bravery.
I grew up in a family that was quite a melting pot. My grandma from my father’s side was half-Dutch and half-Chinese. My father was born an atheist, but then converted to Catholicism. My mother, born Catholic, married her second husband and became a Muslim for 25 years. The marriage ended in divorce and recently she’s found peace in Christianity. I was exposed to the many practices since I was young… and one thing I can say is that it really open my mind and makes me more emphatic towards different cultures.
I wish you and your family a blessed Christmas this year, and a Happy Hanukkah!
Although we are Hindu, we celebrate Christmas every year. It is the spirit of the holiday that is important to remember. I love the last line of your post.
Two things grab my heart as I read this. “We love Daddy and we want to share his whole story.” That says everything about who you are, and what you and Jason are creating.
Inspiring.
And I love the last line. Family is soft. So blessedly soft.
I also adore all the food images here….makes me want to live in a coffeehouse world.
oh this is so awesome, Galit. We are a mixed faith family–well we grew up with different faiths; I think we share many beliefs at this point. We do struggle with how to introduce our children to spirituality and religion.. It is so important to me that they have a foundation of faith. I grew up Jewish but don’t really observe very strongly. We have a menorah and a tree each year. We do what we can at this point, but it’s a work in progress. Enjoy the season!
I’m sure it will be a big tradition, but I think it’s great you guys have decided to share both sets of traditions with the kids. Good luck this season!
Sounds like a great way to teach cultural diversity to your children! I am sure you will find a creative way to merge the tradition!
Sometimes there are words that you read on a page that are so strong you carry them with you always…
“Change is hard, family is soft.”
Will be among those words for me now.
I love this. And that last line is fantastic. So true.
I know I have written this in every one of my comments but I’m going to again…I love your written words!! You’re family i