Stolen Treasure

{by Gailt Breen of These Little Waves}

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photo credit: Sean Hubbard/@seanhubbard

I look at him through red rimmed eyes. He wipes my cheek dry with one thumb and asks, Are you happy?

Yes. No. Sometimes.

Yes, when I’m focused.

No, when I falter.

Sometimes.

We sit in the center of our bed like our three children often do. Our room is large but this space in it is small. Our toes touch. Our voices conspire.

He is loving mixed with worry. I am anxious laced with anger.

Anger because he dared scratch beneath the surface of what I want seen. I am faltering.

When I’m focused, I see a straight path to my treasure. The obstacles along the way are simply tasks to complete.

But inevitably, I falter. I falter. It is my own undoing every single time. I steal my own confidence. My own vision. My own focus.

I hide these treasures somewhere deep inside until they are no longer visible. And I replace them with ugliness. Fear. Insecurity. Jealousy.

What makes you happy? He asks, leading me back.

The kids, you, writing. I list my gems one by one, keeping track on my fingers. I try to hide behind my words, but I can’t.

I slump and put my counting hand down. I need a break. He smiles, because this he can fix.

We talk quietly. Share days. Make plans.

I tuck my children into bed again.

I take advantage of a hot shower and soft fleece.

I ignore my multiplying to do list and spend time with a friend.

Wine and laughter soothe my soul. I share my writing goals. They are big and seem far away.

I’m scared to try.

You’ll be great.

When I falter, kind words wash over me without making the tiniest of imprints.

When I’m focused, I open the door, gently unroll each one, and welcome it in. Believe in it and allow it to restore me.

I have a choice to make, a task to complete. Let go of my stolen treasures and continue down this spiral or consciously stop. Refocus. Reclaim what is rightfully mine.

I come home and softly make my way through each sleeping room.

I breathe in the stillness at each stop and place one hand on each rhythmic heartbeat just for a moment. Careful not to wake, ready to summon the goodness back to me.

I tiptoe downstairs and melt into the large green chair. I wrap myself up in the sheer yellow blanket, open my laptop and begin to type.

Each tap of the keys is a claim: These treasures are mine. I see them, and I am taking them back.

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Story Editor: Heather King ::: @HeatheroftheEO

Edited By heatheroftheeo | November 28th, 2011 | Category: Featured 2, HeatherEO, Memoir, Nonfiction, Tuesday 2 | 76 comments
Tags: Editor-HeatherEO, galit breen, gifts, Heather Westberg King, marriage, these little waves, treasures, Writing
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76 Comments to “Stolen Treasure”

  1. spacer Frelle
    Twitter: frelle
     says:
    November 28, 2011 at 9:46 am

    this is one of my favorite posts from you, beyond heartwarming and so relatable. glad storybleed spotlighted you!!

    Reply
    • spacer Galit Breen
      Twitter: GalitBreen
       says:
      November 30, 2011 at 12:48 am

      Thank you so very much, Jenna. {Truly}
      Galit Breen recently posted..Story Bleed

      Reply
  2. spacer Story Bleed Magazine says:
    November 28, 2011 at 2:07 pm

    Stolen Treasure t.co/eOy8oCGW

    Reply
  3. spacer HeatheroftheEO says:
    November 28, 2011 at 2:42 pm

    The lovely and talented @GalitBreen is featured on @StoryBleed today.She doesn't disappoint spacer – t.co/tp54DFLE

    Reply
  4. spacer Jenna Farelyn says:
    November 28, 2011 at 2:44 pm

    RT @HeatheroftheEO: The lovely and talented @GalitBreen is featured on @StoryBleed today.She doesn't disappoint spacer – t.co/F384qnXa

    Reply
  5. spacer lyzl says:
    November 28, 2011 at 2:44 pm

    RT @heatheroftheeo: The lovely and talented @GalitBreen is featured on @StoryBleed today.She doesn't disappoint spacer – t.co/qhNKjyEg

    Reply
  6. spacer giftsforbabies says:
    November 28, 2011 at 4:04 pm

    Stolen Treasure t.co/y35l0Kvo

    Reply
  7. spacer wendy @ mama one to three
    Twitter: mamaonetothree
     says:
    November 28, 2011 at 5:26 pm

    Love the writing–both sure footed and gentle in its tone. & I love this lit mag! I didn’t know about it before.
    wendy @ mama one to three recently posted..I Am a Guest: Charitable Works and Ballet Flats

    Reply
    • spacer Galit Breen
      Twitter: GalitBreen
       says:
      November 30, 2011 at 12:50 am

      Thank you, friend! I so appreciate your kind words!
      Galit Breen recently posted..Story Bleed

      Reply
  8. spacer Galit Breen says:
    November 28, 2011 at 7:16 pm

    I'm thrilled to have this post on @StoryBleed today! {Please read} Stolen Treasure t.co/y5cVZpQa

    Reply
  9. spacer Ash
    Twitter: ashatshades
     says:
    November 28, 2011 at 7:22 pm

    I really need to favorite this one. I loved it the first time. I needed it the second.

    Go, Galit, go!
    Ash recently posted..Oh the places she will go.

    Reply
    • spacer Galit Breen
      Twitter: GalitBreen
       says:
      November 30, 2011 at 12:50 am

      Thank you, Ash! Your words mean so very much to me!
      Galit Breen recently posted..Story Bleed

      Reply
  10. spacer Mary Lauren @ My3LittleBirds
    Twitter: m3lbblog
     says:
    November 28, 2011 at 9:36 pm

    One of my favorites by one of my favorites. Congratulations, Galit.
    Mary Lauren @ My3LittleBirds recently posted..Out Cold

    Reply
    • spacer Galit Breen
      Twitter: GalitBreen
       says:
      November 30, 2011 at 12:51 am

      Thank you, kind friend. {truly}
      Galit Breen recently posted..Story Bleed

      Reply
  11. spacer HeatheroftheEO says:
    November 28, 2011 at 10:08 pm

    @galitbreen Thank YOU. @storybleed is happy to have you and your Stolen Treasure t.co/tNpeijxp

    Reply
  12. spacer Tenny says:
    November 28, 2011 at 11:57 pm

    When I see the picture, I remember my father because he is one of the persons I know who is using this typewriter…
    Tenny recently posted..How to Deal With The Xbox 360 3 Red Ring Problem

    Reply
    • spacer Galit Breen
      Twitter: GalitBreen
       says:
      November 30, 2011 at 12:51 am

      I adore the photo picked, too. It’s perfection. spacer
      Galit Breen recently posted..Story Bleed

      Reply
  13. spacer Story Bleed Magazine says:
    November 29, 2011 at 2:30 am

    Each tap of the keys is a claim to the Stolen Treasure by @Galitbreen t.co/uuwdsvEB

    Reply
  14. spacer Mary Lauren Weimer says:
    November 29, 2011 at 2:36 am

    Each tap of the keys is a claim to the Stolen Treasure by @Galitbreen t.co/uuwdsvEB

    Reply
  15. spacer Galit Breen says:
    November 29, 2011 at 3:16 am

    This post is so very close to my heart. {Please read} RT @StoryBleed Stolen Treasure by @Galitbreen t.co/9eKWGpZi

    Reply
  16. spacer hubs says:
    November 30, 2011 at 12:44 am

    One of my photos was used in @storybleed Magazine. Cool. t.co/lNShquGb

    Reply
    • spacer Galit Breen
      Twitter: GalitBreen
       says:
      November 30, 2011 at 12:52 am

      The photo is perfect!
      Galit Breen recently posted..Story Bleed

      Reply
  17. Story Bleed : These Little Waves says:
    November 30, 2011 at 12:46 am

    [...] writing is on Story Bleed today.” I [...]

    Reply
  18. spacer Alison@Mama Wants This says:
    November 30, 2011 at 12:52 am

    I so love this, beautiful, Galit.

    Reply