An autobiographical case study by Palyne "PJ" Gaenir
Title and text Copyright © 1993-present by P. Gaenir. All rights reserved.
Welcome to "bewilderness" --
a word I made up to describe something
that seems to be both
"a place" and "a state of mind."
Please begin here.
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open "index.html" in your browser. Bewilderness.zip
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Here's a links menu for jumping directly to a given chapter:
| Author's Introduction | ||
| Prologue (Cover Letter to Lynn) | ||
| Chapter 1 | I remember a time when reality seemed predictable... | |
| Chapter 2 | Real life, dream life, and that new third thing -- what do I call that? | |
| Chapter 3 | Insanity would probably ruin my business reputation. | |
| Chapter 4 | The aliens arrive. Is that what they are? | |
| Chapter 5 | My cosmic identity crisis. | |
| Chapter 6 | The earth moves. My demons? My Angel. And the calling. | |
| Chapter 7 | Waking up. Admitting it. Jumping tracks. | |
| Chapter 8 | Polarity, star geometry, a new language, and the moon. | |
| Chapter 9 | Head-spinning-ly, reality crashing-ly real. | |
| Chapter 10 | More scary stuff. Magick. Someone else's memories. More visions. | |
| Chapter 11 | Recalling a 'UFO' encounter with Gina when I was 8 years old. | |
| Chapter 12 | Who's in control? A validation of sorts. Prophecy. My bad attitude. | |
| Chapter 13 | Am I a bad guy? Sex/merging. My one "medical" memory. Meeting my Aspects. | |
| Chapter 14 | More "stuff" -- does this come in any logical sequence? | |
| Chapter 15 | Isis. More letters. And I'm still a bad guy. | |
| Chapter 16 | The world's "new cycle." Meeting an Aspect in the flesh... so to speak. | |
| Chapter 17 | Reading an abduction book (finally). The tall thin man. The soldier in the graveyard. | |
| Chapter 18 | The cat-eyed guys, and Entities vs. Aliens. | |
| Chapter 19 | Who needs drugs? The astral college. Mind control? and more. | |
| Chapter 20a | Letters I: Q&A re: Aliens/Entities. | |
| Letters II: Problems and Dilemmas... even with others with 'experiences'. | ||
| Chapter 21a | Personal Opinions (and rants) about all this. | |
| Chapter 21b | My Theory on how this works: "The Rainbow of Soul" | |
| Chapter 21c | Conclusions. | |
| About the Author - (palyne at gmail dot com) | ||