Conscious Men: It’s Time for Men to Apologise

A group called Conscious Men is apologising to the whole of femaledom for countless millenia of “the imbalance between male and female energy”, which is a new age way of saying that men have been assholes since time was time. Prostitution, rape, burning at the stake, inequality, subservient chores. You name it, they’re sorry for it and they’re ready to turn things around for a new era of co-creation. After struggling to watch the group’s 8.5 minute manifesto “Dear Woman”, it’s pretty clear that Conscious Men needs to add itself to the list of regrets.

I assume you didn’t get far, so let me sum it up. These blokes “feel deep love, great respect and a growing sense of worship for the gifts of the feminine,” as well as ” deep sorrow about the destructive actions of the unconscious masculine in the past and present.” They also honour a great number of things about women, such as our deep connection to the earth, intuition and profound capacity for feeling, beauty and integrity of our bodies, sense of compassionate justice, and capacity to listen to our bodies and its needs for food, rest, and playtime.

It’s as if they’ve never met a woman at all, but is that a real surprise? This video is loaded with skeevie child molester types and dudes who look like they have roofies in their pockets. It also sports a “Deliverance” extra, a white guy with dreadlocks who isn’t Adam Duritz, and a chap who celebrates women’s ability to “pay attention to what is here, right now” while standing in front of a drawing of a large kitten. I don’t get vibes of sensitivity and awareness from this crew. I feel like I should call Benson and Stabler from Law & Order: SVU and get them on the case before I’m the next one tied up in the sex dungeon.

What’s sad is part of me still wants to believe that these guys are sincere. Luckily, my good sense takes over and remembers that sincerity is about actions, not words delivered in a sappy, overwrought manner that makes the skin crawl. These tools aren’t sensitive or in touch with their feminine sides. They’re needy, self-indulgent creepers who can’t get laid. Instead of working on being a little more attractive to the opposite sex, they turned to what I can only assume is a new age sex cult with a compound, tax free status, and a Facebook page. It would certainly explain why Chameli Ardagh, wife of Arjuna Ardagh - one of the group’s founders who is also hawking his “Deeper Love” retreat in Corfu, stepped off the sanity ladder to pledge her own apology to men on behalf of her “sisters” (women):

“In our bitterness and feminine starvation we empower ourselves by making you small and ridiculous. We speak of the masculine with contempt and disrespect and instead we took it upon ourselves to compete with men, when this was a futile competition to start with.”

I wish there was a Woman Card because I’d snatch Mrs. Ardagh’s out of her hands and cut her with it. The nerve of this bitch. To suggest that I and other women need to share blame for empowering ourselves and making men feel small and ridiculous is completely out of hand. I’m empowered and I’m not apologising for it and neither should anyone else. If that makes a man feel small and ridiculous, then fuck him. He’s not a man and I don’t want him in my life.

20 Comments

Black Dynamite 07/04/2011 at 17:09

That was disgusting. I couldn’t finish.
Adam 07/04/2011 at 17:52

You should’ve listed a disclaimer with that post:

WARNING! Video may cause nausea, impotency, and extreme emotional distress. Have your vomit bag at the ready.
Jordan 07/04/2011 at 18:14

Un-believable. What a bunch of douches!
Fozzy 07/04/2011 at 20:05

As a man, I feel the need to apologize for one thing only:

We are collectively responsible for nothing more and nothing less.
Silver 07/04/2011 at 22:07

I made it 2:35 and had to check out.
Maine 07/04/2011 at 23:53

I was wondering what happened to Big Bub and his legacy of cuckolded emasculation. Someone had to carry the torch of the modern bitchass. Well done.
Maine 07/04/2011 at 23:54
- RISE 08/04/2011 at 07:03
  
  Say what you want about ghetto Luther but he got a lotta pussy with this shit
  - Maine 08/04/2011 at 18:58
    
    A lot of secondhand pussy.
  - JPV 08/04/2011 at 19:30
    
    don’t mean it was good pussy lol
Maine 08/04/2011 at 00:01

I’m machine gun posting, but I’m left with lots of questions.

Collectively, between everyone in the group, how many times do you think they’ve been caught cheating? I mean, nobody else does this, right?

How many of these guys are lifetime Dennis Kucinich voters? 85%? 90%? And how many vegans in the gang? Murse wearers? Sympathy pregnancy advocates?

If you’re married to one of these guys, how many times a day do you fuck around on him because he’s such an immense pussy? And who are you actually thinking about when you’re having sex with him?
- AB6 08/04/2011 at 04:39
  
  “If you’re married to one of these guys, how many times a day do you fuck around on him because he’s such an immense pussy? And who are you actually thinking about when you’re having sex with him?”
  
  These are the sort of dudes who get cuckolded and are forced to sit in the corner and watch while it happens.
  - NHU 08/04/2011 at 05:55
    
    and video tape it.. and clean up.
Jacoby 08/04/2011 at 04:16

I don’t know what to say or how to react so I’ll let Brian Griffin handle it
NHU 08/04/2011 at 05:57

When all these pussies commit mass suicide in a few months, I vote for burying them like women so the archeologists who dig them up in 2,000 years have something to laugh at.
Toxic Web 08/04/2011 at 09:57

Kool-Aid shares up again
Houlihan 08/04/2011 at 14:05

I want to party with these fine gentleman. Pass me a wine cooler or Zima, please and thank you.
Carey 11/04/2011 at 13:19

I think we should thank these bold gentleman for apologizing for us. As a matter of fact I am now going to send this video to all the girls I’ve done wrong and hope they forgive me or at the very least let me hit it just one more time.
Mike 12/04/2011 at 12:34

Ladies, you have my apologies……now fix me a sandwhich bitch
Vandelay 14/04/2011 at 17:13

I hate them with every fabric of my being.

When do we get a new spam quiz? This one’s too much of a lay-up.

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I am a jaded, sarcastic girl prone to unreasonable fits of rage. This site is my outlet. I am not classy, nice, or fair. It's best you know that up front.

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Conscious Men: It’s Time for Men to Apologise

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