Lape Soetan

I often say that finding love is a lot like sales – it’s a game of numbers.  The more people you pitch to, the more likely you are to make a sale and the more people you go on dates with, the more likely you are to find love.  When I say the more people you date, I don’t mean the more people you sleep with.  You can go on dates with 10 people and not sleep with any of them.

Going on several dates helps you recognise the qualities you don’t want in your perfect partner and therefore Continue reading →

People sometimes ask “do you need luck to get married?” The short answer to this is ‘no’.  You don’t actually need anything to get married.  Well, you do need other people.  You can’t be stuck alone on a deserted island and get married but if you’re reading this, I’m going to go out on a limb and assume that you’re not in that situation.  If you’re living in any sort of community where you come across people on a day-to-day basis, it is possible, even easy to get married.  Look at the people who are married.  Rich people, poor people, beautiful people, ugly people.  Every kind of person in this world gets married.  It’s clear that you don’t need luck to get married.  So what exactly do you need?  Continue reading →

When you get to your 30s and are single (but don’t want to be), it’s easy to get depressed.  You feel you’ve prayed more than your share, read every self-help book out there and spent half your life watching motivational videos on YouTube.  Now it’s a new year and you’re seriously thinking about giving up on love and focusing on your career.  After all, what’s the point, nothing you have tried in the past has worked.  But there is a point.  If finding love wasn’t important to you, your mind wouldn’t go there so often.  So give finding your perfect partner  another try.

If you want to take another step towards finding the right person for you but don’t want to go through as much stress as you have in the past, here’s the one thing you need to do:  Continue reading →

There are many cool and not-so-cool things about being single.  One of the not-so-cool things single people complain about the most is loneliness and the loneliest time of the year has to be Christmas.  Christmas is marketed as a time to be surrounded by family and friends and that’s exactly what makes it so lonely.  Being surrounded by family and friends sometimes just makes one more aware of how single they are.  No one to go to concerts with, no-one to discuss the tackiness or prettiness of the different Christmas decorations in the city, no-one to even call you specially to wish you a Merry Christmas.  It’s enough to make anyone feel down.

Christmas time can feel even lonelier because that’s the height of wedding season in Lagos.  Unless you’re very strong, it’s easy to fall into depression at this time of year.  But there’s hope!  Continue reading →

Finding love is a lot like finding a job.  It might not seem that way but it really is.  If you’re a woman in your 30s, I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that at least once in your adult life, you’ve searched for and found a job.  Of course, I know not every single woman in her 30s has had a job before but I’m pretty sure a large percentage of the demographic has.  So, if you’ve ever held down a job and are now looking for love, you have it in you to Continue reading →

It’s often said that when a woman in her 30s isn’t married, it’s because she’s too picky.  If she were less choosy (and more sensible), they say, she would have been married ages ago.  They say that a single woman in her 30s probably feels she is above everyone else.  They tell her there’s no perfect person, to stop looking for Mr. Wonderful and settle for Mr. Whoever.  At least, she would be married by now if she did.  All this talk essentially says that a woman in her 30s (or maybe even in her 20s) should ‘settle’ when it comes to love.

But what does it mean to ‘settle?  Continue reading →

One day a few years ago, I was reflecting on my love life and realised that every boyfriend I had had was an improvement on the one before.  By improvement, I don’t mean each boyfriend was richer than the last (I know that’s the first thing that will come to some people’s minds).  I mean that each boyfriend was more my idea of a great boyfriend than the one before him.  For example, Continue reading →

I don’t know why but when I was younger, I thought a woman needed to be married by 30.  Going by what I’ve heard people say, I wasn’t alone in thinking that way.  When I turned 30 and was still single, I felt a mix of emotions.  I was Continue reading →

We all know that being single is fun but after a while, most people want to share their lives with someone.  They want a life partner.  If you’re ready to meet your ideal partner, then this is the book for you.

If you feel you’ve tried everything to meet the person of your dreams and still haven’t found them, read 7 Steps to Meeting the One.  It’s an easy to understand book with practical steps that you can start putting into action today!  Don’t give up on finding the one for you just yet.  Read 7 Steps to Meeting the One and you’ll be several steps closer to meeting your perfect partner.

To buy 7 Steps to Meeting the One, just click here.

Happy Singles’ Day!  I know lots of people will wonder what there is to celebrate about being single and if you’re like me, you’re surprised there’s even such a thing as Singles’ Day.  There is something known as Singles Day though and according to Wikipedia,  it started in China.

As for how there can be a Singles’ Day, let me introduce you to Continue reading →