Why Does It Cost So Freaking Much For Medical Costs?
We don’t normally cover health care issues (we by no means are experts in medical billing and coding) but since we are huge advocates of safe sex and healthy living, we thought you may find it interesting to see exactly why medical costs are so high. This infographic uses stitches as an example but you can get the idea of how medical treatments related to sex can be so high as well. It’s just another reason why we stress safe sex so much here at Leftos!
Source: MedicalBillingandCoding.Org
Unleashed: The True Story of a Recovering Serial Monogamist
Like Flies on Poop
I’m pretty sure that confidence is a scent that the opposite sex can smell. In fact, the science of psychology states there is indeed a second sense of smell that all humans have, and it’s found in their brain. Well, whatever that sense is, it’s been working overtime for me (even though there still remain some days where you just have to ‘fake it ‘til you make it’).
I have gone through so many stages this summer. The first month after breaking up with my ex was difficult – it was weird and awkward being single. My second month I went just a smidge sexually crazy (sarcasm abound), the third month was spent out of the country, bonding with close girlfriends… Now I feel like I am finally finding my footing four months in (I foresee an extension of my Journey). Strangely enough, it feels like it’s been much longer; we’ll have to see what the next two months bring.
Since month #2, I have been constantly hot, bothered, and just plain horny. Once my motor has been turned over and revved, it’s ON. Yesterday was no different, and I gave in to the delicious internal urge by calling my friendly neighborhood fuck buddy Irish. He told me he was home and, why, of course I could come over to his place for a not-so-quick romp! Honestly, two part question: what guy is going to say no to sex, and what the hell would be wrong with me to turn that down?
Let me just tell you – I completely forgot how perfect Irish’s dick is. How wonderfully big and thick. Just thinking about it gets my juices flowing… Let me take a moment and share some of my unedited notes from my personal journal:
“Yummmmmmm just got me some Irish. What an amazing penis. Oh my god. I have big hands and can barely fit my fingers around it. And I need two hands above each other for the length. Lord help me. Absolutely satisfying. Gets my heart going. And he’s a sweetie to boot. He might be moving to ________. What am I going to do?”
Ok ladies, there are guys that are endowed (score!), and then there are the guys that are endowed and know how to use it (think Hung on HBO). And you enjoy every sacred moment of it so thoroughly regardless of whether you come, and even without the ultimate receipt of sugar cookies. Yes. That’s THIS guy.
But I’ve been sidetracked… It seems that my ever-expanding confidence is rising, and men are attracted to it like puppies and slippers.
Proof: I was unwinding and laying about my bedroom when I was unexpectedly and randomly texted by a younger guy to whom I haven’t spoken in a bit. It happens that he’s a very good-looking kid (even my mom describes his family as gorgeous) but I always viewed him as my good friend’s baby brother so it’s more than a little odd for me. Odd and quite possibly out of contention. Figured he’d be good at least for conversation, naughty as it is, so I had fun with him. Sexting is almost always worth it. It gives you a sexy little secret… And who knows, maybe when I get into my new place I’ll hold a private housewarming party. I’ll just make sure to be up front with him like I am with everyone else: NO RELATIONSHIPS!
I must be exuding this new Eau de Confidence… First, my new hairdresser (who I didn’t mention because he’s taken, but is hot, straight, funny, and sexy). Then, Irish (who needs no introduction). Then Sexy Young One II (who, by the way, shared a very special photo with me – impressive). And it’s not even Saturday… Hot Damn. Can I bottle this?
-Amalie Paris
Follow me on Twitter @AmalieParis so we can chat!
Unleashed: The True Story of a Recovering Serial Monogamist
The Weirdos Come Out With The Rain
Instead of earthworms, the thunderclouds exhume the jerks and the freaks are summoned from the dirt and the pits of despair. Avert your eyes… It’s going to get ugly.
Kay and I went out last night on our weekly ritual of hottie-hunting. We were especially geeked for this particular outing because I’m heading out of the country for three weeks. I was feeling pretty naughty so I wore sexier makeup than usual. However, what we failed to notice was that the cards were clearly stacked against us: (1) the weather wasn’t cooperative; and (2) I had forgotten my driver’s license at home. Fortunately I had another form of ID, but that wasn’t enough to negate what should have been big, red, flashing, neon, warning signs.
After eating dinner and waiting for the dreary rain to stop, we checked out the nearby basement club. The two other nights we had been there had seen little success. I thought it’d be the charmed third time, but no. I couldn’t have been more wrong. Most of the people there were already coupled up and then Kay and I saw, at the same time, Creepy Hat Guy (CHG).
Quick history: We had met CHG another night when he was out with friends. We got late night food with them, but he ended up pushing his legs against Kay’s under the table and generally being an all-around Olympic-level drunk and asshole. We have since spotted him at almost every place we have frequented in that city. Hence, his given title and the reason we (try so very badly to) avoid him like the plague.
Upon spotting him, Kay and I decided that we needed to leave immediately and we headed down the street to another local bar. Not ten minutes later, we see Creepy Hat Guy. He had followed us!!! Slightly unnerving.
We made attempts to shrug him off by going to the back bar, but he followed us AGAIN. It almost got to the point where I suggested we go to the ladies room, but in spite of the trouble, we started our rounds to see if there were any guys worthy of our attention. Not really. There was this immensely tall guy (at least 6′4″), but his face was nothing to write home about. He leaned against me while I was walking by as if to start talking, and I just smiled, put my hand up, and said, no. Never broke my stride.
[I always know what type of mood I'm in based on my reactions to people. I knew then that it'd be an interesting night. You might think that I would just be in one particular mood some day or evening, but I’m just not that simple.]
We took a spot at the bar rail and people-watched, one of our favorite pastimes. Lately, I’ve realized lately that one of the best parts about being leggy with a C-cup (but more so, confident) is that you can pick and choose who you hang out with and talk to… This, again, may seem basic, but trust me, I was a slow learner for whatever reason (could be that I was a late bloomer). I’m sure making up for that!
At some point, Ian (a.k.a. Hairguy) approaches. He’s cute (though, as his namesake indicates, in need of a serious haircut) and built. He’s in! He’s chatting up both of us and trying to get a vibe as to which of us he wants to try and get. Again, let me repeat, he’s in. And then…
BAM!
He ruins it – completely fucks it up. The man cock-blocked himself. Out of the blue, after some innocuous questions about what we do for a living, my answer of “attorney for small companies” crashes us headfirst, with no seatbelts, through the windshield, into an onslaught of a godforsaken political and constitutional law conversation. Did I mention we were in a bar? At 12:30 in the morning?? I may be a lawyer who loves to argue, but I was definitely NOT drinking enough for this particular conversation.
[Note to men: This is a huge no-no. Do not, I repeat, DO NOT talk hard-core politics to complete strangers! Come to think of it, don’t even attempt it with the soft-core politics. You’re just not good enough and we don’t want to hear it.]
Poor Kay was barraged with questions about the definitions of “liberal” and “conservative,” and looked like she had encountered her own personal hell of a intelligence pop quiz. Personally, I’m not entirely sure what the hell happened except that Hairguy went from ‘in like Flynn’ to OUT in the time it takes for an airbag to deploy. The silver lining? While Hairguy was jabbering about health care, CHG came our way and (thank goodness) kept walking. Oh, the small miracles…
In the midst of our “conversation,” Hairguy reached behind us, grabbed his beer and took a sip. Only it wasn’t his beer. He stopped and apologized for drinking our beer; that’s when Kay and I realized… It wasn’t ours either. You should have seen his face when we both said, “That’s not our beer.”
I don’t think I’ve ever laughed so hard in my entire life.
Eventually Hairguy took a breath, saw the damage, and went his own way (but not until after a random sweaty guy got awfully close to dripping on Hairguy and me). Mentally exhausted, Kay and I took seats at an open table and another small miracle occurred: a chance at redemption for the evening in the form of two new guys. Again, CHG passed by behind them (cue Twilight Zone music)…
We decided to dance with the boys but even that didn’t last long because Hairguy came back and starting dancing. Surprisingly, he wasn’t that that bad. But as people tend to get tired when drunk, he soon went home. But the night gets better – wait for it…
Less than five minutes later, some freak started literally rubbing against Kay’s ass, and if that wasn’t enough, he legitimately started freaking on her (Urban Dictionary defines “freaking” as “obscene dancing which simulates sex by the grinding the of the genitalia with suggestive sounds/movements, often done to pop or hip hop or rap music.”). There is NO amount of alcohol in the world that makes that okay.
I’d had enough. These lunatics had crossed the line. I had been rained on, my night out ruined, left my license at home, I wasn’t even buzzed, we’d been followed all night by a creep, we were forced to listen to someone harangue us with politics for thirty minutes (a challenge even when they share similar beliefs), and now this ASSHOLE was freaking my friend. Just as Kay was trying to inch away, I turned to glare at him and shoved him hard. Seriously, there must have been a look of danger on my face because he immediately and repeatedly started apologizing.
There are times when you need to know to admit defeat and call it a night. Nightmare was more like it. I am sad to say that there was almost nothing of redeeming value (shy of the random beer gulp), which is quite depressing – what a waste of a cute outfit and hot makeup. Maybe when I return in three weeks, Kay and I will have just a little more luck. Cross your fingers. In the meantime, I guess I’m having a ménage-a-trois with Jill, Miss Michigan, and myself.
-Amalie Paris
Follow me over on Twitter @AmalieParis
What Kind of Girl is Right For You? [Infographic]
Our friends over at The Campus Socialite shared with us this easy step by step process that helps break down what kind of girl is the right one for you. Never before has finding the “right one” been easier. [Click image to enlarge]
Via: Online Schools & The Campus Socialite
Axe Video Scavenger Hunt
Since we had so much fun with AXE on the “Clean Your Balls” campaign, we’re rolling out a bonus contest! This time we’re asking you to scour through the AXE videos and answer some simple questions about each. All you have to do is follow @AXE on Twitter, then find the answers in the selected video and tweet them @AXE with the hashtag #AXEhunt. The more answers you find, the more likely you are to win! AXE detailers will be given out to winners everyday, and at the end one person will be selected to win a $200 grand prize (USA only please, sorry folks)!
So without further ado, here’s your first video, followed by the five questions that accompany it…THE HUNT IS ON!:
1. Where is Roy’s Nursery?
2. How does Jenna describe her twig and berries?
3. What problem does Jenna definitely not have with her twig and berries?
4. How do you get the dirt off of twig and berries?
5. What does Roy do instead of cleaning his twig and berries?
Unleashed: The True Story of a Recovering Serial Monogamist
The Best Game You Can Name…
I’m a girl who loves to cook and I happen to be very good at it. However, like many of my gifts, I don’t share that information with just anyone because I just don’t like doing it all the time. It’s what you’d call a hidden talent. Anyway, just recently, I got into a small fender bender (which might have been partially Hockey Guy’s fault since we were fooling around in my car)… Regardless, Hockey Guy has been a real sweetheart, calling and texting me to see how I’m doing, how’s my car, and generally being a good guy. I know the reason for that could be him wanting to stay on my good side (since I put out and he likes my very naughty side), but in reality, he’s a really sweet guy who genuinely likes me as a person. So, because I am a sucker for sweeties (who happen to be cute and in great shape), yesterday I went grocery shopping to purchase all the ingredients to cook my famous manicotti.
I was planning on baking it for Guy as thanks for trying to help with the situation… I know how men feel about their food and am familiar with that old (yet true) cliché about the way to a man’s heart, but hell, I also just wanted an excuse to spend more time with him. My manicotti takes at least an hour to cook so I picked up a variety of cheeses and crackers, strawberries and blueberries for an appetizer. I ended up preparing the entire dish at home (excluding the baking) and bringing it to his place. Unfortunately, I had forgotten the crackers at home so we went out, very casually, and bought more. I mention this because that simple action was TORTURE for me – it gets very difficult to control yourself, your hands, and your mouth when your body temperature goes up and you have certain thoughts racing through your head before you even arrive at his place.
Upon finally returning to his place, we watched a bit of television and ate the manicotti – delicious as usual (though more torture). In fact, Guy is such a gentleman that he didn’t initiate anything for the first half of the evening. He told me that I’d have to be in charge of that…
No problem!
The man is smoking hot. Tall (6′1″), blond, and still in a-mazing shape from his NHL days. I may have mentioned before that he was a hockey player… What I meant was National. Hockey. League. Professional hockey. Hello! And let’s just say he’s most definitely not lacking anywhere else either. Long, firm, broad and solid. Like a brick wall – or a good right winger. The epitome of oh-my-goodness. Maybe not as big as Irish (who is?), but a very very close second.
Most of the time was spent closely examining his (ehem) muscles, yea.. muscles…, and heating up his leather couch. Despite being a sweetheart (on the outside), the man has an extremely wicked and wide naughty streak – enough to match me, which I found both intriguing and impressive. And worthy of thorough testing and re-testing. Needless to say, we didn’t quite make it back into his bedroom until it was time to sleep, where we promptly passed out from lack of energy (a good night).
It must have been the spent energy, because I slept pretty well with him. He even warmed up a banana nut muffin in the morning for me (literally). In exchange, I left him some of my delicious manicotti to eat later. I’m hoping I’ll get to see him again soon since he is quite delicious and enjoyable, in more ways than one. Food, sex, and breakfast… does it get better than that?
-Amalie Paris
And don’t forget to follow me @AmalieParis on Twitter so we can chat it up
5 Reasons You Don’t Have A Girlfriend
With Valentines Day just around the corner, there’s no better time to do a self analysis and ask yourself, “Why Don’t I Have A Girlfriend?” It’s a tough enough just to ask yourself that question, but even harder to answer it. Luckily our friends over at ForkParty.com came to the rescue with how you can turn your dilemma upside down. Their list of 5 may seem like common sense but sometimes that’s all your missing in your pursuit for a significant other. Sometimes you’re simply over thinking things and just need a new perspective. Here are the first 2 reasons you don’t have a girlfriend according to ForkParty.com. Be sure to click the link below and check out the rest…
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