TRH Gameday 25 - Florida Panthers: Towel Boy

Written by The Royal Half | 01 December 2011

Game #25

LA Kings 
(12-8-4, 14th in NHL)
vs
Florida Panthers
(13-7-4, 7th in NHL)

7:30pm, Staples Center
Los Angeles, CA

BEST FLORIDA PANTHER TO NEVER PLAY ONE GAME FOR THE LA KINGS... LITERALLY:

NHL PLAYOFF APPEARANCES IN THE LAST 10 SEASONS:
LA KINGS - 4
FLORIDA PANTHERS - 0 

BEST OPPOSITION BLOG:
Litter Box Cats

Once, the Florida Panthers were a struggling franchise that had to do what ever it takes to get people to come to their home games. Then... for one glorious month the Panthers were the talk of South Beach. And then the NBA came back. But after a summer in which they brought in 10 (!) new players, the Florida Panthers are now the talk of the NHL with their amazing record of 13-7-4! Which is nearly 1 more win and 1 less loss than the awful, have-to-fire-their-coach LA Kings. Boy, that's gotta have a lot of Kings fans seeing red. 

My eyes. My eyezzzz.

While the Florida Panthers may finally be a decent draw on the road... I am still looking forward to the Los Angeles Kings free giveaway tonight at Staples Center. 

That's right! It's Marco Sturm "Throw In The Towel" Free Towel Giveaway Night!

Let's be honest... Marco Sturm's time in LA was not all that great. But it sure is classy of this organization to honour Sturm in tonight's game. Luckily, the Los Angeles Kings are having a Career Night as part of the Marco Sturm "Throw In The Towel" Free Towel Night!!! promotion. So Marco will be able to get advice on what he should do once his NHL career thankfully comes to an end. But realistically... are there really any jobs out there for a NHL forward who was traded to the Los Angeles Kings and can't score to save his life?

You've got to be fucking kidding me.

That's right, former LA King Trading Deadline Acquisition, Anson Carter, is now doing analysis on the NHL Network. Surprisingly, this is the 2nd best job available for a NHL forward who was traded to the Kings and can't score to save his life.

Nope, the best job available is Healthy Scratch.

Sorry, folks... you'll have to wait at least one more game for the return of PennerPoint. But tonight, against the Florida Panthers, we can all watch in breathless anticipation and see if  Marco Sturm can score his first goal this seas.... oh SHIT... he already has 1! Why, that's one more than Dustin Penner has this season! I wish there was some way to visually represent this.

This still remains my favorite moment in Florida sports history...

Come on, Terry Murray, win tonight... so that you can show the new guy in town why you are exactly the 2nd best Coach in Southern California now. Well, 3rd best in all of California, really.