I wrote a book!
Here’s a little story about how it all happened.
I started way back in, oh, 2002 or so, not too long after my own wedding. I was going gangbusters on it for a while. My husband, especially, was excited about it—he said he had a good feeling about it, right from the start. It got to be about book length, but after a while, I just… stopped. I couldn’t find the throughline—I couldn’t figure out what the book was about. My husband kept nudging me and nudging me, “Just finish the book!” But I was well and truly stuck.
Life went on. I got a deal for another book, we became parents… Every so often, particularly when I’d get into my “what am I doing with my life?” lament, my husband would say “You know? You should just finish that wedding book.” and I’d say, “I know, I know…” I’d open up the file, fiddle with a few words, and then close it again.
Then, last year—I don’t know what changed, but I decided it was time. I had a trip planned, and I came up with a cunning scheme: I printed out the entire thing, tossed a red pen in my bag, and (this is the key) packed nothing else to read for the entire trip.
Away from home and family and distractions of all sorts, I read every word, red pen in hand. I crossed out paragraphs, pages, and whole chapters. I scribbled notes in the margin and wrote whole new chapters out in longhand. By the end of the trip, I knew what the book was about. It wasn’t about DIY, or saving money, or even creativity (though all those things are woven through it).
It is a book about making choices—meaningful, personal choices. It’s about getting to the heart of what marriage means to you and building an event around that. It’s about you—as a couple—being true to yourselves.
So: that’s my book, and I’m super-excited to get it out into the world. What do you think? I’d love to hear your reactions in the comments.
Care to read a chapter? Just jump on my mailing list and I’ll send it over.
Announcing… Going Home Married (my new book!)
Going Home Married: How to Plan a Meaningful Wedding Without Losing Your Mind is a workbook, a series of questions designed to help readers find their own meaning in the wedding ceremony and design an event around that. I aim to deflate stress by questioning the familiar wedding hoopla. Unlike most wedding books, which start with either the budget or the dress, I make the radical argument that the ceremony is the heart of a wedding, and that once you’re married, all the rest is icing on the cake (as it were). Going Home Married walks readers through the myriad choices they’ll encounter on the path to making their wedding their own.
The highest praise I could imagine came from a friend who was in the thick of wedding planning when she read a draft: “This book made me feel not-crazy.”
It is a book about making choices—meaningful, personal choices. It’s about getting to the heart of what marriage means to you and building an event around that. It’s about you—as a couple—being true to yourselves.
Want to read a sample chapter? Sign up for my mailing list!
Keep up with all the book launch fun at goinghomemarried.com.
And please – let me know what you think in the comments!
A Cure for the Januaries
For many years, I’ve suffered what my husband calls “the Januaries.” I might as well call them what they are: Post-Christmas let-down. See, I’m a bit of a Christmas nut, and once Christmas was over, I’d droop and mope around for a month or so, and eventually snap out of it as life went on.
Christmas 2010 was particularly stressful. There had been maybe two weekends since September when everyone in my house was healthy at the same time. Christmas eve found me hiding in the corner at my sister-in-law’s, avoiding hugging anyone because I had both pinkeye and laryngitis, and madly finishing the year’s Christmas ornaments (that year it was angora snowflakes wet-blocked to round plastic needle-point thingies) for the neices and nephews, which I hadn’t finished earlier because everyone was sick.
So as the 2011 Januaries loomed, my husband had a brilliant idea. ”Start Christmas now,” he said. ”That way you’ll be done in plenty of time and we can relax and have fun.” Immediately my mind starting whirling. If I had twelve whole months to make ornaments, I could break out the book I’d been eyeing for years: Angels: A Knitter’s Dozen . It was a whole book of tiny lace angels, knitted on size 1 dpns (aka toothpicks) with crochet cotton, and starched. They were gorgeous, but I was intimidated. However, with a year stretching out before me, I decided I could handle it.
Handle it I did – and lo, the Januaries did not appear. There was no Post-Christmas Letdown because Christmas was already in full swing! I made seven of those angels, and yes, it took months (mostly because I knit a bunch of other stuff too, and because what REALLY intimidated me was the starching, which turned out to be not so bad. Not as bad as the fiddly maddening assembly). By late fall, I had:
And I had a cure for the Januaries! Simple! Just keep Christmas going!
I also decided that I would never again make those fiddly, sticky, starchy, adorable angels. In fact, in a fit of pique over the endless fiddling, I designed and finished the (muuuuch simpler) 2012 ornaments, just because I could:
Which brings us to this January, this one that started today. Christmas is over, and next year’s Christmas ornaments are done. So what do I do now?
Never fear: I have a three-pronged plan of attack.
Prong one: The most beautiful socks in the world. They have cables and stained-glass-window colors and they’re all mine! They’re fiddly and time consuming and I love them.
Prong two: Fireside sweater. My darling, brilliant husband bought me enough Malabrigo (Emerald Blue, if you’re wondering) to make a Fireside sweater (Ravelry link). I just cast on a couple of days ago.
Prong three: I’m publishing a book in the next couple of months. There, I said it. Woo!
I know it’s de rigueur to talk about how excited you are about a new project, but it is true. I am truly proud of this book and excited to see it go out in the world. It’s not a knitting book – it’s a book about weddings, which I started, oh, 9 years ago. You’ll be hearing (a lot) more about it shortly.
Socks, a sweater, and a book. Sounds like a cure for the Januaries to me!
If you believed you were beautiful…
What would you do differently if you really and truly believed that you were beautiful?
Would you spend a little more time on your hair in the morning? A little less? Would you chop it off? Would you let it grow? Color it? Let it go grey?
Would you wear more skirts? Ditch the “mom jeans”? Forgo pantyhose? Wear a flower behind your ear?
If you believed you were beautiful, would you smile more often? Let the fake smile melt off your face? Cry if you needed to?
If you believed, deep down, that you were beautiful, could you tell the truth?
Would you wash your face every night? Would you ditch some of the creams and potions? Would you go to bed early, get your “beauty sleep”? Would you stay up late, talking and laughing and watching the stars go by?
Never in a million, gazillion years did I think I’d quote Lil Wayne, but then I found this on tumblr:
Believe it. You are beautiful.
Bitty Mitts
Adorable and quick ornaments – a great way to use up scraps of sock yarn. I used an initial motif over a background of stripes (and dots in one case). This works best with a motif that is 7-11 st wide and 8-10 st high.
Yarn: leftover sock yarn – or any yarn, for that matter
Needles: appropriate to weight of yarn used, dpns or circular
For the samples shown, I used Sport weight yarn and Sz 3 dpns.
Notions: stitch holder (or safety pin, or scrap of yarn) to hold live thumb stitches.
Sizes: bitty odd and bitty even. The two sizes listed ensure proper centering of odd(even) width motifs, i.e., if your motif is 9 stitches wide, use the first number, if it’s 10 stitches wide, use the second number. Subtract your motif width from 13(14) and divide that number by 2 – that’s the number of “border” stitches on either side of your motif, e.g., if your motif is 9 st wide, then figure 13-9=4/2=2 border st. Note that for a while, you’ll have more border stitches on one side of your motif because of the thumb shaping.
Cast on 18(20) st, arrange for magic loop or on 3 dpns (if using dpns, put half the stitches on one and split the rest onto two more – this way it’s easier to keep track of the two sides of the mitten.)
Arrange in a loop, being careful not to twist stitches.
Work 1×1 ribbing for 5-6 rounds.
Start whatever background pattern (e.g., stripes) you want now.
Round 1) Kfb, K1, Kfb, K2(3), Kfb, K1, Kfb, K1, repeat. 26(28 st)
2) K 11(12), Kfb, K1, Kfb, K to end
3) K
Now start your motif on top of your background pattern. Because the mitts will be hung on the tree from the cuff, work your motif upside-down.
You can pull your motif yarn straight across from the other side – after all, no one has to get their hands inside the mitt!
4) K border st, work top row of motif, K to last 2 st on that side, Kfb, K1, Kfb, K border st, work top row of motif , K border st
5) K, working motif as set
6) K border st, work motif, K to last 2 st on that side, Kfb, K1, Kfb, K to motif, work motif , K border st
7) K, working motif as set
8 ) K border st, work motif, K border st, slip next 6 st to a stitch holder, safety pin, or scrap of yarn, K border st, work motif, K border st
Keep going as set until motif is finished. Then work 2-3 rounds of background pattern.
Next round: (in pattern) SSK, K9(10), K2tog, repeat
Next round: (in pattern) SSK 3 times, [K1, K2tog twice](K2tog 3 times)
Cut yarn and pull through remaining st.
Now pick up the thumb st, and pick up two more st on the body side.
Work in pattern for 3-4 rounds, then K2tog 4 times, cut yarn, and pull yarn through remaining st.
You can pretty much stuff your yarn ends inside. Block if you want to. Use the CO tail to make a little loop, and hang it from your tree!
Look, a diagram!
I’m teaching a class! Finding Your Voice: A Creative Writing Workshop
I’m teaching a class this fall in the Gaithersburg/Montgomery Village, MD area. I hope you’ll join me! I’m super-excited.
Here’s the official description:
Whether you want to write a blog, a book or just an honest letter, this workshop is designed to shake up your writing habits. Your ideas of what you should sound like may be getting in the way of your true writing voice. We will work to uncover something that sounds like you.
Through class discussion and writing exercises, we will explore the concept of writer’s voice, develop a writing practice and explore writing exercises that you’ll be able to use time and time again.No. 4029.420
Mondays
Sept. 26 to Oct. 31
7:30 to 8:30 p.m.
$40/Resident, $50/Non-resident
Whetstone Community Center
Click here for instructions on how to register.
Remember the Gaithersburg Book Festival?
Thanks to Phil Fabrizio and the Gaithersburg Book Festival for the great photo! It was a fantastic event, and it looks like they’re doing it again!
Profile on Washington Parent
Wow. I met Karen Kullgren at the Gaithersburg Book Festival last summer, and now she’s written a lovely profile of yours truly for Washington Parent magazine. Thanks, Karen!
Top-Down No Math Hat: The Manly Version
Well! My original Top-Down No Math Hat made a bit of a splash over on Ravelry, and I’m quite tickled about my 83 loves (and counting!) and many many queues.
It is Christmas knitting season, and as I set out to knit many many variations of the hat for those that I love, I had a sudden, sickening realization.
It’s kinda girly, isn’t it?
See, I have nephews. Three of them. I have two sons, too, but they’re little and they’re getting hats with trains on them. I also have two nieces, and, well, pretty stuff is easy. But I have three nephews and the youngest one is ten. They don’t want cute or funky – they want manly knits.
And so desperate times call for… new patterns.
A manly hat
Without further ado, I present my Top-Down No Math Hat: The Manly Version. (Hint: it’s pretty much the same pattern, without the YOs.)
Yarn: again, whatever you like. Any weight – truly doesn’t matter. About a hat’s worth (I do this by squishing it in my hand and seeing if it kinda feels like squishing a hat. As you can tell, I’m a bit cavalier with my knitting.)
Needles: whatever the label calls for, or a bit smaller. You can use dpns to start, then switch to a smallish (24”) circular, or you can stay on dpns throughout, or you can magic loop it.
Notions: a tapestry needle and a freewheeling attitude.
Pattern Note: what makes this pattern work is a particularly swish increase that I first found over at the awesomely wonderful TechKnitting: A very nearly invisible increase. Go take a look. When I use inc1 below, this is what I mean.
Very nearly invisible increases
CO 6 st. Distribute evenly on 3 dpns, or use a magic loop. Join, being careful not to twist.
Row 1 (and all odd rows): k
Row 2: inc1, k1, repeat to end (12 st)
Row 4: inc1, k2, repeat to end (18 st)
Row 6: inc1, k3, repeat to end (24 st)
You see what I’m doing here, right? Increasing 6 st in every other row, lining up the yos increases to make pretty swirly lines manly, nearly invisible shaping. Notice that it totally looks like you’re doing K2togs from the other direction. Freaky!
Continue in this manner until the circumference of your knitting is a little smaller (an inch less? Thereabouts?) than the circumference of the head you’re knitting for. (Still not planning to block. I’m as cavalier as ever.)
Row 23 (or whatever) and all odd rows thereforth: k
Keep knitting until you only have a few yards left, or until it looks like a hat. Then think about ribbing for a while. Or, if you prefer a rolled brim, just keep knitting. BO loosely. Sew in the ends.
It doesn’t look like much, does it? Nothing earth-shattering. But I will remind you: it is a hat with no math!
Top-Down No Math Variations
My, my – my little hat has gotten a lot of attention! 145 hits in the first week – wow! Thanks to everyone who has taken a look, and thanks for the Ravelry love!
So, here are some more things you can do with this cute little hat.
Two Colors
Run out of yarn? Just start with something new! The blue is Pingouin Typhon (Ravelry link). The white is some random fluffy stuff from the stash.
Stripes
Two smallish balls? (of yarn, folks! come on…) Just alternate. I started a new color with each YO round. I did several rows of one color in straight K for the brim. Cream is Patons Classic Wool. I think the lavender is Patons Canadiana.
Eggplant!
Definitely my favorite…
I started with a bit of i-cord, then use YOs to get up to 6 st to get started. I worked in green for a bit, then introduced the purple, decreasing the green by one st every other row. Because intarsia and circular knitting don’t mix, I had to carry both colors across until the leaves were done. I used both yarns for the YOs and for knitting into the YOs (just imagine that they are slightly “hairy” leaves!) Magically, when I was done with the leaves, I was also happy with the circumference, so once I went to all purple, I also went to all K. Both colors are Patons Canadiana from an old fruit hat kit.
Coming soon – a manly version!