Wednesday, February 9, 2011

More answers than questions

I am at a place in my life where I feel like I am itching to do something. It doesn't have to be big. In fact, I would prefer if it wasn't!

But I want to do SOMETHING!!! My baby boy turns 2 next week. He is my precious gift. My complete surprise. My wonder boy. But with that surprise came a halt to my dreams. A slight shift in my future.

But having a 2 year old is much different than having a newborn or an infant. I am once again on the cusp of seeking to pursue my passions. To do something significant.

For all of my mama friends, I know exactly what you are thinking- what can be more significant than raising and nurturing children and seeing them fall in love with Jesus? And I have to say that I agree with you. I see my role as Mom to be incredibly important (and rewarding). But when I became I mom, I didn't suddenly lose my gifts or my desires. Some of my gifts have been enhanced by being a mom (if you could see me dance!!!) and I have learned to do things that I never thought I would do (I WILL finish sewing L's quilt!).

Pursuing a counseling degree? That hasn't happened. Playing sports? On hold. Travelling the world? My passport has expired.

These past 8 years of being in this holding pattern have taught me some important lessons. #1. God is in control. He is the one who holds my future. It is not about me! #2. Just when I think I have learned a lesson, God makes it abundantly clear that I have much more to learn on the subject. #3. Life is not about the destination; it is about the journey (I have no idea who first said that, but I am very aware that that is not my own thought!). It's just that good. #4. I need to take things one day at a time.

I don't want to do SOMETHING that is not what God wants for me. So I will wait with all of the answers that these years have brought my way and while I wait, I am going to find some more good questions!

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