Siblings remember love through appreciation
Last week I had the honor of facilitating a game of Do Tell at the Kids Helping Kids Leadership Academy. I had no idea what to expect so my camera man and I went armed with lights, cameras, games and our spirits.
We arrived at the place and set up all of our equipment and waited for folks to arrive. By the time we began there were five kids and a few adults.
Two of the kids were siblings and they had the “normal” adversarial kind of relationship. One was kind of mean to the other. The younger one, a boy, was looking for a lot of attention from his older sister and she simply wasn’t into it. He was very rambunctious and interrupted a lot. She rolled her eyes often.
At one point during the game, I stopped the play and talked about the tool of Appreciation. I explained that when there is something or someone in our lives who is bugging us, it helps to find something to appreciate about them. It’s not that it changes anything about that person or that circumstance, but it will change something within us and we will feel better.
I asked the boy if he could find something to appreciate about his sister. He thought for a moment, trying to find anything he appreciated about her and said, “No.” When asked to look a little deeper he replied, “No, nothing.” Then he told us, “She’s mean to me.” When his sister heard that, she raised her hand (unlike her brother who just butted in) and said, “I know (something to appreciate). Love. I love him.”
You could have heard a pin drop. Her brother took in her statement, you could see his body change. Then he turned to look at her for a moment. He shyly turned away again and said, “You too.” I asked him to tell her that he loved her and when he did, she smiled at him and he put his arm around her for a moment. It was one of those moments in time that all of us will remember. It was sweet, tender and profound. It’s why I made these games.
As I continued to talk about Appreciation, he realized that he did have something to appreciate about his sister and he wanted to share it with all of us. He said, “I’ve got something! She taught me how to play the recorder!” He was so happy with himself because he had found something to appreciate on his own. His energy had shifted and you can bet that their relationship changed because of this exchange.
So remember. if you have some circumstance or person that you’re not thrilled with, find something to appreciate about them and things will change. I can guarantee it!
Sphere: Related ContentKathy Jacobson