Dear 2011: Thanks for Everything

Dear 2011,

I can’t believe it’s almost time for you to go. It feels like you greeted me just yesterday with a sense excitement and trepidation that only you could bring from the start. I celebrated your arrival. I looked forward to the milestones you’d bring. I worried about the consequences of the unknown. I tried to live this year one day at time. I planned and failed to do the same. I accepted victories and got frustrated by defeat.

You marked the end of a journey and the beginning of a dream. I knew you’d be a big deal back in 2008. You were my last graduation year – the culmination of almost a decade of semesters filled with tears, self-doubt, procrastination, almost failures, support, and determination. You reminded me of the difference between pursuing passion and seeking security.

Once the pomp and circumstance quieted to a whisper, you forced change on me. You made me question my comfort zone and pushed the limits of my emotional boundaries. You rattled me with the force of an earthquake. My foundations were exposed and had to withstand pressures they’d never felt before. You taught me to look inward; coaxed me into trusting myself and the lessons I’ve learned thus far. You unmasked my vulnerability and told me it was okay to show her face. Sometimes.

You taught me to take care of myself. I’ve learned to balance the needs of others without sacrificing my own. You helped me find my voice.

You did a lot of good, but you delivered your share of pain, too. You forced me to confront death. I’ve mended and ended relationships because you said it was time.

I’m grateful for making it this far with you. I’m looking forward to meeting 2012 and seeing what it has in store for me. I’m not going to rush you away. You weren’t always easy to deal with, but every year brings its own trouble. Thank you for the good and the bad. Thank you for the laughter and tears. Thank you for forcing me on the journey I resisted for so long. Thank you for confusion and clarity.

I’m not going to talk about resolutions and such. Just know that I will be better with 2012  than I was with you. I haven’t figured out all the specifics yet, but like me, that list is a work in progress.

Here’s to a year gone. Here’s to another chance get this life thing right.

**raises glass**

Give To Yourself: What’s On Your Self-ish Wish List?

“It’s the most wonderful time of year,” right? Christmas is right around the corner and between gift giving, visiting family and friends, and spending whatever extra money we have, we often deplete our energy and bank accounts in the name of bringing joy to others. But in the hustle and bustle of catching sales and wrapping gifts, we often forget about things that we want and need to do for ourselves.

Usually, wish lists consist of gifts we can get from people – that new gadget, a fly addition to your wardrobe, or maybe something shiny to put on your wrist. As we think about what we want to get from others, we don’t think about what we want to do for ourselves. Some things can only be gifted from yourself to yourself. Think about what you have wanted to do, accomplish, or attain in the last few months or so. What sacrifices have you made so you could do for others? What has gotten in the way of what you want for yourself?

Take some time in the next few days to think about what will challenge you or renew you. Is there a project you have stopped working on or haven’t started at all? Is there a book you have been meaning to read (or start writing)? Is there work you need do to get your finances in order? Have you been hesitant to pursue a new opportunity? What do you need to take that next step?

Make a “self-ish” wish-list. You’re not doing things for yourself instead of doing for others, but you are making sure you’re a priority, too. See? Self-ish.

Start by looking at the areas you are looking to add to or change. Plain and simple, ask yourself “What do I want?” Then figure out what you need to do to make it happen.

Here’s the start of my list:

1. Time for me

No, I haven’t found out how to add more hours to a day, but I know I need to make more time for myself. So what do I need to do to give myself more time? Instead of looking in a store, I’m looking at my typical day and trying to figure out where I can make adjustments. How can I be more efficient? What am I wasting time doing? What do what I want to do instead?

2. Pampering (or something like it)

I’ve already been doing this, but I am going to keep this up. This requires some budgeting because I’m talking about keeping my eyebrows, hair, hands, and feets (even in the winter) done pretty regularly. I’ve never really been able to do this for myself, but recently, I’ve seen how looking good can keep me feeling good, too.

3. Improved credit and finances

This is definitely something no one else can do for me. Between creating a monthly budget, setting up automatic savings, and getting on the phone with these monsters credit card companies to advocate for better rates and such, I’m trying to learn and make my money grow.

The good thing about this list is that it doesn’t revolve around Christmas and it can keep growing without increasing your debt. This holiday season, in addition to doing for others, challenge yourself to do something for yourself.

What are you putting on your self-ish wish list?

Wishing you joy,

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• Dear 2011: Thanks for Everything
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