Sandra Beasley » Don’t Kill the Birthday Girl

When butter is deadly and eggs can make your throat swell shut, cupcakes and other joys of childhood are out of the question–and so Sandra’s mother used to warn guests against a toxic, frosting-tinged kiss with “Don’t kill the birthday girl!” Tackling a long-marginalized subject, this book intertwines a cultural history and sociological study of food allergies with humorous and sometimes heartbreaking real-life experience. From a short-lived gig as a restaurant reviewer to the dates that ended with trips to the emergency room, step inside the story of a modern young woman coming to terms with a potentially deadly disorder.

Hardcover and eBook - $23.00 - ISBN #978-0-307-58811-1
Pub. date July 12, 2011
Available NOW from Barnes & Noble (and NOOK), Amazon.com (and Amazon Kindle), iTunes/iBook, IndieBound, Borders, Powell’s, Politics & Prose, Teaching for Change, Square Books, and many other retailers nationwide.

Interested in having Sandra speak with your reading group?
Check out this handy Reading Group Guide [18 questions, formatted in PDF for easy printing],
and email bookclub@sandrabeasley.com for more information.

-Recognized as a top summer read by SELF, HEALTH, PREVENTION, and PEOPLE-

-A top-5 FINALIST for the 2011 Goodreads Choice Awards in “Food & Cooking”-

“Winning, wise and humorous, you’ll think twice when someone says, ‘Pass the peanuts.’”
—Adriana Trigiani, bestselling author of Don’t Sing at the Table

“Brilliantly combining her personal narrative with medical research and cultural analyses, Beasley’s memoir is ultimately an exploration of how we negotiate our vulnerable, permeable selves in a world that is filled equally with joy and harm.”
—Richard McCann, author of Mother of Sorrows

“In sparkling prose, Beasley has written a memoir that becomes a remarkable mélange—undeniably informative, and a real pleasure—both hip and wickedly smart.”
—Alex Lemon, author of Happy: A Memoir and Fancy Beasts

“Sandra Beasley’s book is both hilarious and moving. It’s about what it’s like to live in fear of hidden parmesan, but it’s also about teenage rebellion, romance and George Washington Carver. Recommended for everyone, no matter what their immune system is like.”
—A.J. Jacobs, author of My Life as an Experiment and The Year of Living Biblically

Other Media:
“Vegan, gluten-free? Tips for safe and tasty trips,” published on CNN.com
“Confessions of an Allergic Mind,” for Psychology Today’s “The Fallible Mind” (January 2012)
“The Vagabond Diet,” for Writing Up an Appetite (December 2011)
“Save the Party from Hives” and podcast radio interview, for Wriggling in the Middle with Dr. Merle Griff and DeLores Pressley (November 2011)
“Navigating Food Allergies: Safe Halloween Treats and a Live Talk with Author Sandra Beasley,” for The Motherhood (October 2011)
“Guest Blog: Sandra Beasley,” for Lofty Ambitions (October 2011)
“Wordy Birds: Sandra Beasley” for WRIR in Richmond (podcast available)
“Five Questions with Sandra Beasley,” for E. Ethelbert Miller’s E-Notes (September 2011)
“In Search of SSU (Sinus Sister University),” SinusSister.com (September 2011)
“Top 10 Not-To-Be-Missed Adult Books for Your Back-to-School Shelves” selection by School Library Journal in August 2011
“Don’t Kill the Birthday Girl: And other tips from a food-allergic adult on how to host a safe party for kids,” as profiled on The RetailMeNot Insider
“Faith Middleton Show: Stratford’s Garbage Museum; Don’t Kill the Birthday Girl; In Defense of Flogging” for WNPR in Connecticut (podcast available)
“The Diane Rehm Show: Sandra Beasley” for NPR/WAMU (transcript or audio available)
“Book Talk: Sandra Beasley,” with Stephen Usery for WYPL in Memphis (podcast available)
“Q&A: Sandra Beasley says allergies can bring out insensitivity in others” in Canada’s The Globe & Mail on July 20, 2011
Featured in Shelf-Awareness for Readers on July 15, 2011
“Stuck in a Food Fight for Life” in the Washington Post EXPRESS on July 19, 2011
“Love Me, Love My Allergies” published by eHarmony under advice on “Dating Issues”
“Peanut Power” on the Peanuts: Energy for the Good Life blog of the National Peanut Board
“On Our Bookshelf: Don’t Kill the Birthday Girl” from the Food Allergy Alliance (book excerpt)
“Author Q&A: Fear of Food” in PARADE’s “Summer Reading!” edition on July 10, 2011
“An ‘Allergy Girl’ Comes Out of Her Bubble” in the Wall Street Journal on July 9, 2011
“Minefield Loving,” a “Two-Minute Memoir” in the August Psychology Today [PDF version]
“Don’t Kill the Birthday Guest,” published on CNN.com
Eatocracy: a Sandra-friendly “Chocolate Love Cake” recipe on CNN.com
“Sandra Beasley and Food Allergy Awareness Week,” published on TheRecipeClub.net
“Ten Things a Parent Can Do to Host an Allergy-Friendly Kids’ Party” [downloadable PDF]
“Ten Things a Parent Can Do to Host an Allergy-Friendly Party” [downloadable PDF]
“Food Fight,” a related “XX File” in the Washington Post Magazine on March 15, 2009

Check out Sandra reading from DKTBG in July 2011 at Square Books in Oxford, MS:

Check out the official book trailer:

Review Excerpts:

Hill Rag (Karen Lyon) - In a frank and witty new memoir…Beasley writes knowledgeably about the physiology, history, and treatment of allergies.
Examiner.com (Joshua Gray) - Beasley tackles a lot within these pages: she educates her readers on daily issues food allergies present, as well as the social, cultural, and historical issues, dispelling myths in the process. Readers may be surprised at how their thought process changes after reading each chapter.
Macleans (Jessica Allen) - If you didn’t have sympathy for this relatively new generation of sufferers, you will after Beasley’s book.
Washington Post (Suzanne Allard Levingston) - The refrain at young Sandra’s parties was the oddly cheerful “Don’t Kill the Birthday Girl”—the title of her honest and amusing medical memoir that’s also a patient-written primer on food allergies. This birthday girl doesn’t kvetch, though she has every right to….Despite all her challenges, Beasley lives with gusto, not fear.
School Library Journal (John Sexton) - Despite living in a world in which just about everything seems to want to kill her, she writes with a sense of humor that sustains her insights and abundant research about allergies. [An "Adult Books 4 Teens" pick]
Boston Globe (Judy Bolton-Fasman) - In this charming book, part memoir and part handbook, poet Sandra Beasley forthrightly casts herself and others with serious food allergies as “people who–for better or for worse–experience the world in a slightly different way.’’ Beasley is a warm and lively guide to the quirky world of allergies, demonstrating on page after page that this “is not the story of how we [the allergic] die…[but] the stories of how we live.’’
The Barnes & Noble Review (Barbara Spindel) - Don’t Kill the Birthday Girl: Tales From an Allergic Life, presents these poignant details not with self-pity but with insight and humor as Beasley describes her struggle to fit in–and survive–while managing severe allergies….
Star Tribune (Meganne Fabrega) - Not only is her memoir an invaluable resource for parents of children with allergies, as well as the children themselves, it also is a testament to Beasley’s admirable strength and sharp sense of humor in the face of personal adversity.
- Publisher’s Weekly - In this intelligent and witty memoir, poet Beasley (I Was the Jukebox) recounts her lifelong struggle to live a normal life while waging a battle against deadly food allergies. The author is one of “more than 12 million Americans who have been diagnosed with food allergies, a figure that includes almost 4% of all children.” The title of this enthralling book is not hyperbole. As little as a kiss or hug from a family member or a friend who had eaten cake or ice cream at a birthday party could cause Beasley to break out in hives or, worse, suffer anaphylactic shock. She calls sherbet “sweet, icy death in a bowl.” Beasley details her vigilant parents’ never-ending routine for keeping her safe during her childhood until she left for college, how she and her friends coped with “the thousand minor hassles of living with” her food allergies during college, and the perils of eating while traveling. Throughout this thoughtful and well-written book, Beasley closes the knowledge gap surrounding food allergies. She writes entertainingly about the history of allergies, and current research findings; religious issues surrounding food allergies; and processed foods and their hidden ingredients. (June)
- Kirkus Reviews - [Excerpt] Former American Scholar editor and award-winning poet Beasley’s debut memoir is a fascinating—though at times disjointed—account of living with severe allergies. The author’s earliest recollections involved birthdays and the way they highlighted her difference from others. While her mother would give her “Sandra-friendly” treats, she would prepare a cake for everyone else and warn guests not to touch, kiss or hug her—hives, anaphylactic shock or death could be the unwelcome result. Needless to say, growing up sensitive to more than a dozen kinds of foods and 10 different kinds of animals and environmental elements was a huge challenge. … Interspersed with memories of the daily game of “Russian roulette” she was forced to play well into young adulthood are well-researched sections about such neglected topics as the history of allergy identification and treatment, as well as interesting anecdotes about the little-known social exclusions faced by people with allergies.
- Booklist - Imagine a birthday cake made without dairy products or eggs. That’s what highly allergic author Beasley faces every year—hence her friends’ and relatives’ constant refrain, “Now, don’t kill the birthday girl.” As she notes, she’s hardly alone: more than 12 million Americans have been diagnosed with food allergies. She worries about whether she’ll add to that tally when she gives birth. Her book is full of interesting (and potentially lifesaving) tidbits: Play-Doh contains wheat. Tempera paints often contain egg. Moisturizing soap may contain soy proteins or cashew oil. Borden used to make Elmer’s glue with a milk derivative, casein. And French fries are a good choice for the highly allergic. (There are no hidden nuts, dairy, or eggs in them.) People with wheat allergies need to be careful at communion: A decade ago, Boston’s Roman Catholic Church affirmed its decree that rice-based wafers were an unacceptable substitute for the regular wheat-based variety. This information- and anecdote-filled book will be a welcome antidote to the worries and fears endured by families with food allergies.